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Morning Dump

Paultards may have found the perfect country for exile.

What's in a name?

Oh please oh please oh please oh please...

Field Trip!!!

West Virginia you say?

Meghan McCain admits that embracing handsome young gentlemen callers is the GOP's Only Hope™

Conservative Hobbit GOP's New Hope™

The NY Times has profiled Jonathan Krohn, the scary tween who gave a rousing speech at CPAC to a room full of drooling pedos and deep-fried Twinkie enthusiasts.

Krohn is your average home-schooled kid from Georgia who learns Latin from a Christian school on Fridays and studies Arabic with a tutor:

SITTING in the back seat of his mother’s van as she drives through Atlanta suburbs, Jonathan Krohn is about to sign off with a conservative radio talk show host in Florida. In the 40 minutes he’s been on the air, with the help of his mother’s cellphone, this hyper-articulate Georgia eighth grader has attacked the stimulus bill, identified leaders he thinks will salvage the Republican Party’s image, and assessed the legitimacy of Barack Obama’s birth certificate.

The show’s host chuckles and asks whether President Obama has called Jonathan “a little fascist.”

“The president hasn’t come after me yet,” Jonathan says chummily, “but we’ve had other people come after me!”

“Jonathan!” his mother hisses from the driver’s seat.


Guess mom is still touchy after screening phone calls from Mark Foley.

Even Bill Bennett has a not-so-secret crush on Krohn:

Jonathan would wake up at 6 a.m. to listen to Bill Bennett’s “Morning in America” show and became riveted by politics and American history. Soon, Mr. Bennett, whom Jonathan now describes as, “my mentor and very good friend,” was taking Jonathan’s calls.

“Jonathan was an extraordinary boy, very special,” Mr. Bennett said, in a phone interview. “He wowed my audience, he wowed me. He’s very engaging and learned. He’s got staying power.”


Gross.

This species of hobbit is more complicated than you'd imagine. For one, he is an anti-semitic Jew:

...He received a computer from his maternal grandfather for his 13th birthday. “In the Jewish culture in which my mom was raised, 13 is a big deal,” he said. “But since I’m a Jewish Christian, I don’t do a bar mitzvah.” (Decades ago, his mother became a Baptist.)


Shame on you, Mr. Krohn.

And shame on you, Rush and Michael Steele, for allowing this kid to appear more relevant than both of you, the Mexican Child King, and Bible Spice combined.

President Unicorn will handily win all 50 states in 2012.

HuffBlow Demands You Report To Obama Gulag IMMEDIATELY

Hahahaha. Stupid Huffington Post believes people will actually "donate" their "time" to give hobos spongebaths or something in honor of Hopey's Inauguration, just like he asked.

Like it wasn't enough to donate your money to help the Hawaiian Tiki Messiah get elected in the first place. And what about that time we almost got murded on election day. Huh?

Much to our surpise, the liberal commenters at HuffBlow will be doing more than just sitting around naked in the moonlight, bathing in goat blood. Here's a sample of how lame some people really are:

"I have to work, so am taking the late shift at a soup kitchen put on by a local church down the street from me. I will help with the end of the dinner rush and will be srubbing pots and pans and prepping the dinner for the following evening."

"I will be volunteering at Shelter House, a place for victims of domestic violence can go to get support. I will also be donating food."

"Donating and bagging baby products for a local shelter during the day and singing at a MLK service in the evening."

"I will be volunteering this weekend cleaning up streets in our neighborhood and then on Sunday I will be attending and volunteering at a Barak Obama event at the Califorina African Museum, and then on Monday I will be doing yard work at a pre school and reading to young kids."

All of these suckers will feel pretty stupid when they come home from all their volunteer suck-up assignments only to find that Pres. Mooslim has kidnapped their children and sold them to Korean sex rings.

We'll just stay home, drinking and awaiting the race riot.

Will you fist bump me? Check "Yes" or "No"

Colin Powell appears on MTP tomorrow, interviewed by........who the fuck hosts MTP now? Brokaw? Really?

The NY Daily News thinks Powell will endorse Superman.

Their argument:

After months of playing political Hamlet, Colin Powell is finally ready to tell America who he likes for President - and the smart money says Barack Obama is Powell's choice.

..."After Sunday people aren't going to have any doubt who he's voting for."


Also, there seems to be no love loss between Cliff and WALNUTS!:

Two other colleagues Powell has consulted in recent weeks told The News that while Powell admires McCain, he's roubled that the GOP candidate has surrounded himself with hardline national security advisers.

"McCain has too many neocons working for him," said one Republican source familiar with Powell's thinking.
Powell is also irked that McCain's political handlers orchestrated disingenuous leaks to reporters during the Democratic convention that Powell was a leading candidate to be McCain's running mate.

The News reported in August that when McCain met with Powell in early summer to lobby for his endorsement, Powell told the Arizona senator he wouldn't join the ticket under any circumstances.

Obama also privately lobbied Powell after the primaries and has called the general frequently since in hopes of making the sale. McCain, by contrast, has been AWOL; Powell hasn't heard from him in months.

"He wishes McCain could give him a reason to vote for him, but he hasn't yet," a Powell associate told The News.
Powell told both suitors their politics were a bit too off-center for his tastes: Obama too liberal, McCain too conservative.

...Powell knows McCain far better than Obama and gave $2,300 to his then-struggling primary campaign in August 2007. At the time, however, he told McCain the contribution was because of their long friendship and wasn't an endorsement.


And what of Barry?:

At the same time, Powell is known to admire Obama's swift rise to national prominence and recognizes the Democrat's symbolic importance to African-American aspirations and racial progress.

In April, Powell praised Obama's skill in assembling a first-rate campaign operation. "That gives me some indication that [despite] his inexperience in foreign affairs or domestic affairs, he may also be somebody who can learn quickly," he said.

Inexperience.

Learning quickly.

A Final Word From Sarah Palin

"God has made us this promise: If we will commit our works to Him, we will succeed. Our lives can be enhanced by applying this, and by thinking optimistically. In Alaska we have mosquitoes; we also have the most beautiful mountains in the world. The choice is ours as to which we'll focus on."



via Hotties in the News

UPDATE:: Sarah Palin ate some pizza:

Aboard her campaign plane, after taking questions for the first time from the reporters who follow her every move, Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin told the assembled press and two senior aides standing near her that she didn't want to watch the presidential debate "in my hotel room with just campaign staffers."

The campaign hadn't scheduled a debating watching party for her, but that plan quickly changed. After Palin spoke at a rally here, her campaign entourage of aides and reporters drove to a local pizzeria called Boli's on the Boulevard. Palin went casual, appearing in blue jeans and a purple windbreaker she had been given after her speech at the East Carolina University a few minutes earlier.

As she greeted the surprised crowd of more than 50 at the small pizza place, she posed for several cell phone pictures. When Dana Corey, who was about to start eating, realized Palin was there, he was on the phone with wife. He asked if Palin would say hello and the governor did, joking, "Libby, why is your husband here drinking beer without you?"

The Corey family lives in Wilmington, N.C., and Mrs. Corey explained to the governor that her husband was there because he was working on a construction project in Greenville.

...Asked how the debate went, she was enthusiastic as usual.

"Great. Great. It was a great night for America. He's proposing real plans that will work for economic recovery and energy independence," she said of her running mate.

..."I've been an underdog quite often in my life -- and so has John McCain. And we both have come out victorious," she said. "I anticipate that's what going to what we see at the end of the day on Nov. 4."


Our live blog here.

The Obama Youth

So, um, yeh. This is the first St. Barack thing that really freaks me the fuck out.

via the Youtubes

Joe Biden Delivers

This is what we've been waiting for:

Biden had an awkward moment during a rally in Columbia, Mo., Tuesday. At the start of his remarks, he pointed out several state lawmakers in the audience for praise. When he got to Chuck Graham, a state senator from Green Meadows, Biden urged the lawmaker to "stand up Chuck, let 'em see ya."

But Graham, who is in a wheelchair, can't stand up - a fact Biden quickly picked up on.

"God love ya, what am I talking about," Biden said. "You can tell I'm new," he quipped, asking the audience to stand up for Graham instead.

"It happens all the time," Graham told Politico after the rally. He called Biden very gracious for coming over to him once he realized his mistake.

"It still happens to me after 12 years" in state politics, said Graham. "It doesn't bother me a bit."

Obama Supporter Holds Depressing House Party

Ever been invited to a party where you show up and immediately want to leave because the host would not stop talking about their sicknesses?

This is exactly what happened when "Marla" from CO was strong armed by her negro husband to hold an Obama blowjob party. People showed up expecting to consume bruschetta and HOPE™, but only received the chance to sit and cry on her staircase while she gave details about her tata cancer.

Try alcohol next time. The poors seem to love that stuff.

via Barack Obama

Obama To Speak Shortly In Front Of German HOPE™ Dong

Live feed here.

Greatest Story Of The Day

WALNUTS! had another one of those awful townhall meetings where he stutters through the prepared remarks and poses for that creepy grin alot.

It was pretty boring until some crazy old lady bitter told McCain that his staffers suck and his campaign is pretty much some glorified donkey show:

It was a statement that a McCain town-hall participant said would land her on the campaign's "s**t list."

Addressing the Republican presidential candidate during his town-hall forum in New Hampshire Tuesday, a woman identified herself as a volunteer for his campaign, and said she had come to believe it was time McCain hires a new staff in the state.

"You've got to make some changes," the woman told McCain. "I've had problems with a lot of your paid staff."

The volunteers had put up all the signs ahead of the town hall event, she complained. "You've got two people sitting right here next to me…They have done more work for you volunteering than a lot of your paid staff have. All your signs that are up outside today, they were put up by us, not by your staff people.”

McCain, whose campaign has battled charges of incompetence — even from some within his own party — joked, "A lot of our paid staff, a lot of them are on work release programs as you know."

This is why B.A. Barackus should def meet John McCain at 1000 of these events before the election. While WALNUTS!'s supporters (or "cunts" as they are called by the campaign) will throw chairs at random 20yo interns, Hopetards will fight each other over the honor of sucking The Messiah's balls.

Bitters Refuse To Give Black Man A Dolla

Hilltards just aren't feeling Sen. Unicorn and raised only about $20,000 out of his $52 million June haul. Why does Hillary Clinton hate black people and HOPE™?

From HuffPo:

When comparing Obama's full FEC filing for June with a list of 311 "Hillraisers" -- or supporters who bundled more than $100,000 in contributions for Sen. Clinton -- the Huffington Post found only eight names in common between the two lists. Not all of those donors maxed out, either, making for a relatively paltry figure of $19,250 in direct, hard-money contributions from Hillraisers for the month.

That does not mean that only eight of Clinton's top donors have contributed to Obama since Clinton dropped out. Several dozen more Hillraisers are rumored to have donated in July, but those details will not be available until late August. Some other prominent Hillraisers, like Barbaralee Diamonstein-Spielvogel, have hosted high-dollar events at their homes, drawing many more times the $4600 limit they each could have given individually by law.

He Made It!!!!

No thanks to Cotton McCain, Sen. Unicorn and his muscular buttocks made it safe and sound to that shithole east of us the Middle East to start his International HOPE™ Tour.

He visited with the troops (while silently hating them and flipping them the bird behind their backs) and even met some generals or something:

On Saturday, the senator from Illinois traveled to eastern Afghanistan to visit Americans forces under NATO's Regional Command East. Obama is accompanied by Sen. Charles Hagel, R-Nebraska, and Sen. Jack Reed, D-Rhode Island.

The senators met service members at Jalalabad airfield in Nangarhar province.

The governor of Nangarhar province, Gul Agha Shirzai -- formerly the governor of Kandahar province -- also met the senators at the air base. Shirzai and Obama embraced briefly at the end of the meeting.

After this, Barack will head to Europe where he will feel much more comfortable drinking bitter white wines with various elitist communist leaders.

McCain's Senior Moment May Endanger Unicorns

Funny story. Barack is starting the first leg of his international HOPE™ tour and WALNUTS! decided to tell anyone with a television or internets that Sen. Unicorn would land in Iraq in a couple of days:

Republican presidential candidate John McCain said on Friday that his Democratic opponent, Barack Obama, is likely to be in Iraq over the weekend.
The Obama campaign has tried to cloak the Illinois senator's trip in some measure of secrecy for security reasons. The White House, State Department and Pentagon do not announce senior officials' visits to Iraq in advance.

"I believe that either today or tomorrow -- and I'm not privy to his schedule -- Sen. Obama will be landing in Iraq with some other senators" who make up a congressional delegation, McCain told a campaign fund-raising luncheon.

...The Reuters piece hints at it. But if Obama is going to be in Iraq this weekend, this is a major breach on McCain's part. As a knowledgeable insider notes ...

If it is true that Obama is going to Iraq this weekend, it is a very serious mistake for McCain to have disclosed it publically. Even for run-of-the-mill CODELs the military gives guidance like, "Please strongly discourage Congressional offices from issuing press releases prior to their trips which mention their intent to travel to the AOR and/or the dates of that travel or their scheduled meetings. Such releases are a serious compromise to OPSEC." If Obama is going to Iraq this weekend, I can not begin to imagine how much this is complicating the security planning for the trip.

Help Obama Family Adopt A Hobo AIDS Dog

Hey, remember that video where St. Barack of Obama pimped out his Mooslim family for an interview where they discussed getting a dog?

Now there's a site called Obama Family Dog that wants the First Family to adopt one of those horrible kennel dogs that have various assortments of fleas, manges, and gonorrheas:

If Sen. Barack Obama becomes president, he'll instantly be faced with decisions that will affect millions of Americans. Obama will also soon be making a decision that could affect millions of American dogs. It has been reported that once the election is over, the Obamas will be looking for a new four-legged family member (much to his daughters' delight).

The American Kennel Club (AKC) has suggested five types of purebred dogs that would fit the Obamas' lifestyle. While we don't disagree that it's important to choose a dog that matches well with the family, mixed breeds should certainly be considered along with pure breeds. Also, whether purebred or mutt, we believe the Obamas should make a winning choice and adopt a family dog, not buy one.

Sign the petition, unless you want the terrorists to win. It's your duty as an American.

Everyone Hates HOPE™

Barry Hussein iz n ur cuntry clubz.

The GOP is tired of motherfucking HOPE™ on this motherucking plane.

Oh yeh, he's a black.

Here's Another Way You Can Help Pay For Hope-filled Ads

You can buy this WANTED poster created by an elderly Mexican artist named "Juan McCain", of which Hopey now sells on his website.

Just for fun, they put up a video of how these posters are made in those hardworking bitter paper printing factory things. Clearly, this is pandering to those of us who grew up on Mr. Rogers.

Date Set For Obama/Clinton Makeout Party

On June 26, Hillary is forcing all of her lady bitters to show up and give money to the inadequate black male.

The lady bitters will be forced to write the presumptive Mooslim checks (made out to HOPE™) and in return, St. Barack will encourage his donors to donate to Hillary so she doesn't become a hobo like the rest of us.

This is how our politics are done. Yeah!!!

via HuffPo