Saturday, March 14, 2009
Half The World Has Seen This, But Who Cares?
Coffee shot across our screen the first time we saw this.
From the Youtubes description:
This song aired on The Mornin' Show, a local program carried by NBC affiliate WTVA in Tupelo, Mississippi.
BREAKING NEWS: BREAKFAST SINGERS IDENTIFIED!
This from Tom Joyners website www.blackamericaweb.com. The lady singer was interviewed on his March 13th show.
In the clip, Minister Cleo Clariet and his fiancé Katherine Lane are shown singing on "The Kay Bain Show" in Tupelo, Mississippi in May or June of 2004.
Clariet passed away from congenital heart disease on Dec. 13, 2004. Lane said he would have been thrilled to know his song is now entertaining so many people.
Our fave line: "No mo' Cap'n Crunch"
via videogum
Friday, March 13, 2009
The Fuck Did You Just Say To Me?
Wow.
Here's an interview with Rachel Maddow by George Wayne (DISCLAIMER: THIS GUY IS FUCKING CREEPY) of Vanity Fair:
Anyway, Miss “Cable Queen,” as Vogue calls you, do you suffer from any paraphilia?
Paraphilia?
Listen to this saucy pedant. Paraphilia is having a rare erotic fetish. Perhaps you may indulge in eproctophilia?
Duh?
Darling! Eproctophiliacs are those sexually turned on by farts and farting!
That word actually exists?
It is the current rage of Mayfair high society in jolly, kinky London. G.W. will admit to his Caesarophilia—erotic fascination with royalty. Especially that redhead Prince Harry. G.W. has been fantasizing more than ever of tossing that royal salad. I would floss every strand of that red burr to perfection!
He did just break up with his girlfriend.
Exactly. Prince Harry is single and now ready for his bi-flingual.
He’s getting a little tummy.
At least he’s not losing all his hair like William. By the way, before your Peacock Network makeover, didn’t you have a dyke-stache?
A what?
Facial hair over your lip—a dyke-stache.
I never had any facial hair in my life.
Thank you for that clarification, darling. And thank you for such a wonderful meeting!
via HuffBlow
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Congratulations, Gents. Bristol's Back On The Market
If you were planning on a quick stop by Cracker Barrel's gift shop, turn the car around. Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston have cancelled their wedding registry and are splitting up.
Yesterday, Star Magazine reported that the two snowbillies called it quits:
The teen love affair that rocked last year's presidential race is over.
Sarah Palin's daughter, Bristol, has ditched her baby daddy, Levi Johnston!
Now's Levi's sister, Mercede is telling all exclusively to Star and the picture she paints of life in Wasilla, Alaska is not a pretty one. Bristol, 18, has virtually cut Levi out of the life of their two-month-old son Tripp.
"Levi tries to visit Tripp every single day, but Bristol makes it nearly impossible. She tells him he can't take the baby to our house because she doesn't want him around 'white trash'!" Bristol won't even allow him to watch the baby for a few hours -- unless he's babysitting!
The worst part, Mercede continues, is that the former vice presidential candidate supports Bristol's treatment of Levi, 19. "I used to love Sarah," Mercede says sadly. "But I've lost lots of respect for her."
The AP has confirmed the story:
Levi Johnston and Bristol Palin, the teenage daughter of Gov. Sarah Palin, have broken off their engagement, he said Wednesday, about 2 1/2 months after the couple had a baby. Johnston, 19, told The Associated Press that he and 18-year-old Bristol Palin mutually decided "a while ago" to end their relationship. He declined to elaborate as he stood outside his family's home in Wasilla, about 40 miles north of Anchorage.
He also said some details of the breakup, rumors of which had been swirling on the Internet, were inaccurate.
Bristol Palin said in a statement that she was devastated about a report on Star magazine's Web site that quoted Levi's sister, Mercede, as saying Bristol "makes it nearly impossible" to visit the teenagers' infant son, Tripp. The baby was born Dec. 27.
"Unfortunately, my family has seen many people say and do many things to `cash in' on the Palin name," said the statement, which was issued through the governor's political action committee. "Sometimes that greed clouds good judgment and the truth."
In summary: Joe the plumber is stoked that he has a shot at marrying in to the Palin clan and we're stoked we saved the receipts for the "His and Her" camo towels and that case of Natty we bought as wedding gifts.
Everyone Throwing Michael Steele Under The Back Of The Bus
Jesus, this guy can't get a break.The first black RNC chair is under fire by basically every white Republican in the country.
First, they didn't take kindly to his idea of talking to brown people. Then, they didn't like his use of the intertubes. Oh, and that skirmish he had with the bloated, over-medicated douche nozzle.
Now, he's really screwed he pooch by telling GQ, a magazine for closeted men, that abortion should be a decision left to Americans with lady parts:
How much of your pro-life stance, for you, is informed not just by your Catholic faith but by the fact that you were adopted?
Oh, a lot. Absolutely. I see the power of life in that—I mean, and the power of choice! The thing to keep in mind about it… Uh, you know, I think as a country we get off on these misguided conversations that throw around terms that really misrepresent truth.
Explain that.
The choice issue cuts two ways. You can choose life, or you can choose abortion. You know, my mother chose life. So, you know, I think the power of the argument of choice boils down to stating a case for one or the other.
Are you saying you think women have the right to choose abortion?
Yeah. I mean, again, I think that’s an individual choice.
You do?
Yeah. Absolutely.
Earlier in the article, while still stating he doesn't believe in marriage rights for sodomists, they're cool people and it's not their fault they'll spend an eternity in the Lake of Fire:
Let’s talk about gay marriage. What’s your position?
Well, my position is, hey, look, I have been, um, supportive of a lot of my friends who are gay in some of the core things that they believe are important to them. You know, the ability to be able to share in the information of your partner, to have the ability to—particularly in times of crisis—to manage their affairs and to help them through that as others—you know, as family members or others—would be able to do. I just draw the line at the gay marriage. And that’s not antigay, no. Heck no! It’s just that, you know, from my faith tradition and upbringing, I believe that marriage—that institution, the sanctity of it—is reserved for a man and a woman. That’s just my view. And I’m not gonna jump up and down and beat people upside the head about it, and tell gays that they’re wrong for wanting to aspire to that, and all of that craziness. That’s why I believe that the states should have an opportunity to address that issue.
So you think it’s a state issue?
Absolutely. Just as a general principle, I don’t like mucking around with the Constitution. I’m sorry, I just don’t. I think, you know, in a pluralistic, dynamic society as the one that we have, every five years you can have a constitutional convention about something, you know? I don’t think we should be, you know, dancing around and trying to amend it every time I’ve got a social issue or a political issue or a business issue that I want to get addressed. Having said that, I think that the states are the best laboratory, the best place for those decisions to be made, because they will then reflect the majority of the community in which the issue is raised. And that’s exactly what a republic is all about.
Do you think homosexuality is a choice?
Oh, no. I don’t think I’ve ever really subscribed to that view, that you can turn it on and off like a water tap. Um, you know, I think that there’s a whole lot that goes into the makeup of an individual that, uh, you just can’t simply say, oh, like, “Tomorrow morning I’m gonna stop being gay.” It’s like saying, “Tomorrow morning I’m gonna stop being black.”
As expected, the Klan didn't care for these remarks at all:
Steele drew fire from activists Thursday morning for his remarks.
"I think it is very troubling for a public figure, of either party, particularly one who presents himself as pro-life, to describe the abortion issue as being a matter of 'individual choice,'" That is language straight out of Planned Parenthood's messaging playbook," said Charmaine Yoest, the president and CEO of Americans United for Life Action, who said she hadn't heard from the RNC. "There are millions of pro-life Americans, Republican and Democrat, who are looking for leadership on the life issue and they will find Mr. Steele's comments disturbing and demoralizing."
Another anti-abortion activist and sharp critic of President Barack Obama on the subject, Jill Stanek, was even blunter.
"Michael Steele has just unmistakably proclaimed himself to be pro-choice," she said in an email. "You thought he was 'embattled' last week over his Limbaugh comment? Ha. He has now stepped both feet into it."
This forced Steele to backtrack:
I am pro-life, always have been, always will be.
I tried to present why I am pro life while recognizing that my mother had a "choice" before deciding to put me up for adoption. I thank her every day for supporting life. The strength of the pro life movement lies in choosing life and sharing the wisdom of that choice with those who face difficult circumstances. They did that for my mother and I am here today because they did. In my view Roe vs. Wade was wrongly decided and should be repealed. I realize that there are good people in our party who disagree with me on this issue.
But the Republican Party is and will continue to be the party of life. I support our platform and its call for a Human Life Amendment. It is important that we stand up for the defenseless and that we continue to work to change the hearts and minds of our fellow countrymen so that we can welcome all children and protect them under the law.
Now it's rumored that Katon Dawson, the elderly Grand Wizard who came in second to Steele, is organizing a no confidence vote for next week:
Republican insiders tell Political Wire that a no confidence vote on RNC Chairman Michael Steele is likely to be called after the NY-20 special election on March 31 -- regardless of whether Republicans win the seat or not.
Katon Dawson, who came in second in the January RNC vote, is said to be quietly organizing a vote and is getting the support of several state party chairmen who want to dump Steele.
This will probably work and brickbat will have no further interesting stories about the RNC chair because he will be replaced by a boring white guy.
Sigh.
Why We Watch Hardball: Reason 15,623
Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy
If you don't have time to watch the whole deal, here's one of the highlights:
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Today's Godtube/tangle Moment
What will actually happen when the Son of Gawd comes back to Earth for the Raptures?
Mexicans will be left behind with no toilet paper as Lord Xenu barrels down from Heaven astride Shadowfax to date rape Christians, leaving their clothes on the ground for the rest of us to clean up.
Asshole.
via tangle
Checkin' In With Chuck
Taking a page from the Paultard playbook, WorldNetDaily hitman Chuck Norris mulls the idea of a Texas secession. And guess who would be president? Chuck Norris:
On Glenn Beck's radio show last week, I quipped in response to our wayward federal government, "I may run for president of Texas."
That need may be a reality sooner than we think. If not me, someone someday may again be running for president of the Lone Star state, if the state of the union continues to turn into the enemy of the state.
From the East Coast to the "Left Coast," America seems to be moving further and further from its founders' vision and government.
...Thomas Jefferson counseled us, "We must not let our rulers load us with perpetual debt." Yet the Feds have just skyrocketed our national deficit and debt by trillions of dollars, and it plans much more fiscal expansion with few expectations of resistance. Despite that George Washington admonished, "To contract new debts is not the way to pay for old ones," we keep borrowing and bailing, while we watch the stock market plunge further every time we do.
...Patrick Henry taught that, "Our Constitution is … an instrument for its people to restrain the government." Yet our Congress and president stampede that founding document, overlook its explicitness and manipulate its words to abandon a balance of power and accommodate their own desires, partisan politics and runaway spending.
Whoa. It's like the Doctor Congressman L. Ron Paultard has possessed the body of Chuck.
It gets
When I appeared on Glenn Beck's radio show, he told me that someone had asked him, "Do you really believe that there is going to be trouble in the future?" And he answered, "If this country starts to spiral out of control and Mexico melts down or whatever, if it really starts to spiral out of control, before America allows a country to become a totalitarian country (which it would have under I think the Republicans as well in this situation; they were taking us to the same place, just slower), Americans won't stand for it. There will be parts of the country that will rise up." Then Glenn asked me and his listening audience, "And where's that going to come from?" He answered his own question, "Texas, it's going to come from Texas. Do you agree with that Chuck?" I replied, "Oh yeah!" Definitely.
It was these types of thoughts that led me to utter the tongue-n-cheek frustration on Glenn Beck's radio show, "I may run for president of Texas!"
I'm not saying that other states won't muster the gumption to stand and secede, but Texas has the history to prove it. As most know, Texas was its own country before it joined the Union as its 28th state. From 1836 to 1846, Texas was its own Republic. Washington-on-the-Brazos (river) served as our Philadelphia, Pa. It was there, on March 2, 1836, where a band of patriots forged the Texas Declaration of Independence. (We just celebrated these dates last week.)
...As Sam Houston once said, "Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may."
Just last Friday, the Alamo celebrated its 173rd commemoration, when on March 6, 1836, Texans under Col. William B. Travis were overcome by the Mexican army after a two-week siege at the Alamo in San Antonio. But they didn't go down without a hell-of-a-fight, as those roughly 145 Texans fought to their dying breaths against more than 2,000 Mexican forces under Gen. Santa Anna. (Casualties in the battle were 189 Texans vs. about 1,600 Mexicans.) They lost that battle, but would provide the inspiration to win the war. Their fighting spirit rallied the new-found republic, and still does to this day. So when you think all is lost in America, remember the Alamo!
For those losing hope, and others wanting to rekindle the patriotic fires of early America, I encourage you to join Fox News' Glenn Beck, me and millions of people across the country in the live telecast, "We Surround Them," on Friday afternoon (March 13 at 5 p.m. ET, 4 p.m. CT and 2 p.m. PST). Thousands of cell groups will be united around the country in solidarity over the concerns for our nation. You can host or attend a viewing party by going to Glenn's website. My wife Gena and I will be hosting one from our Texas ranch, in which we've invited many family members, friends and law enforcement to join us. It's our way of saying "We're united, we're tired of the corruption, and we're not going to take it anymore!"
Again, Sam Houston put it well when he gave the marching orders, "We view ourselves on the eve of battle. We are nerved for the contest, and must conquer or perish. It is vain to look for present aid: None is at hand. We must now act or abandon all hope! Rally to the standard, and be no longer the scoff of mercenary tongues! Be men, be free men, that your children may bless their father's name."
Chuck Norris is a secret Mexican Paultard.
Suck It, Blindy.
You too, faker.
Lambo raped the stage and every other contestant on Idol last night.
Also, here's an LA Times article from a few days ago touching on the Adam Lambert gay boyfriend thingy:
There's been some joking on various websites that this year's most flamboyant front-runner, Adam Lambert, will perform Jackson's early '90s hit "In the Closet" as a response to recently leaked photographs of him kissing a man and dressed in glamour-queen drag.
...The closet metaphor most often applies to hidden homosexual identities, and that's certainly a hot button issue for "Idol." The show has drawn its own curtain around apparently gay contestants over the years. So far, Lambert has been as matter-of-fact about his orientation as possible without actually uttering the word "gay" on camera. He's poised, doing his little dance around a major aspect of his private life; he's not the first to have to do so.
...Within a painfully immodest pop universe, "Idol" stands as a champion of family values -- and of the endangered naughty giggle. The banter between the show's male regulars, especially host Ryan Seacrest and judge Simon Cowell, is steeped in an outdated frat-boy homophobia that is never funny and often deeply uncomfortable. You'd think that the formal protest lodged in 2006 by the gay-rights organization GLAAD would have put a stop to such antics, but they've just kept coming.
"Idol's" closet contains much more than sexuality, though. It includes language differences, religious affiliation and its contestants' complex family lives. The daring Lambert might break down the wall of homophobia this season, but it's just as likely one of the show's several Christian worship leaders, including Lambert's main male rival Danny Gokey, will push the producers to let fundamentalist Christianity out of the box in which it's not very well contained.
UPDATE:
While writing this post, we were casually listening to the 4th grueling hour of The Today Show, hosted by that annoying twat and the drunken Mooslim.
After bouncing around from Cats to Billy Elliot to dirty contact lenses, they start in on Idol. Hoda starts giving Lambo praise, and Kathie Lee interrupts and says he reminds her of "Aerosmith....no, Steve Perry....no, Journey."
Really?
You can suck it too, Kathie Lee.
Morning Dump
Jim Cramer will appear on the Daily Show Thursday to duel Jon Stewart to the death. Also, Jim Cramer is a moron.
South Carolina first state to refuse Obama government cheese. SC will also change their state motto to "Two men enter, one man leave. Welcome to Thunderdome!"
Meet your new Narc.
Recession hits GOP, forcing them to eat leftovers.
If you wanna rewrite history, wait until most of the people who were there are dead.
President Obama will never work in Hollywood.
Washington State Senate passes domestic partnership bill by wide margin.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Hand Your Babies Over, Please. President Obama Is Hungry
That didn't take long at all. Barack the baby eater reversed Bush era bans on stem cell research.
Who can blame him? Infants are considered a fine delicacy in some cultures:
President Barack Obama Monday rescinded the Bush administration’s limits on federal funding for embryonic stem cell research and chided his predecessor for putting politics ahead of science.
Obama also signed an order meant to put scientific research back in the forefront in government decision-making.
“It is about ensuring that scientific data is never distorted or concealed to serve a political agenda — and that we make scientific decisions based on facts, not ideology,” Obama said.
Another bright side? Ingredients for embryonic egg sardou will be dirt cheap.
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Today's Paultard Video
The tiniest paultard hobbit is back again, imploring fellow gold-fellating 9/11 truther fucksticks to make 20 second video messages for President Obama.
People actually did this:
Dear Mr. Obama: Please do not close Guantánamo Bay and allow brickbat to write the guest list.
via Middle-earth
WorldNetDaily Incensed By Obama White House Rainbow Party Orgies
Mexican news webpamhplet WorldNetDaily hates President Obama and the fancy sex parties he throws for his friends and frenemies:
Larry Klayman, founder of Freedom Watch, told WND today he's seeking information about the partying in the White House since the Obamas moved in.
...Klayman said the reports of the partying at the White House, "with the likes of Steve Wonder and other high priced entertainment stars," will be the focus of document requests being submitted to the General Services Administration. The requests will seek to determine how much taxpayer money is being used.
"Barack and Michelle Obama have been throwing taxpayer funded parties nearly every night with their 'friends' and supporters, with Michelle Obama even exhorting them not to 'break' White House property," Klayman's announcement said.
"This party atmosphere sends the wrong message to the American people. As the Obama-Clinton crowd party on, the American people are suffering greatly," Klayman said.
"It was right to criticize corporate execs for using taxpayer bailout money on bonuses and corporate junkets. In the face of this criticism, it is an outrage for Barack and Michelle Obama to party on, as Rome burns. It's like throwing a party at a funeral," he said.
..."Using one of the world’s most famous private residences as bait, President Barack Obama and first lady Michelle Obama are unleashing a bipartisan charm offensive and exploiting every square inch of their new home to make friends and influence rivals. The social calendar suggests a return to the days of Camelot," the report said.
No surpise that an old conservative dildo hates the idea of black people running around the White House "touching things".
Or the fact that the First Family doesn't eat Hungry Man dinners off their laps:
Dinners have featured lavish menus including "Celery Soup, Wild Mushroom Crisps, Steelhead Salmon with Citrus sauce, Crispy Spinach, Toasted Saffron Couscous Pearls, Baby Iceberg lettuce with Maytag Bleu Cheese and Yogurt ranch dressing and for dessert, Milk Chocolate velvet cake" – all served on gold-rimmed china.
Impeachment!!! NOW!!!
via WND
Local Moron Mentioned On Famous Moron's Show
Jesus jump roping Christ.
In short:
A man who flies a Confederate flag on property he owns on Beal Parkway added two large signs Wednesday to express his feelings about President Barack Obama.
"January 20, 2009, A Day of Darkness, Hussen (sic)" is written on both signs, which are each about the size of a dinner table.
...Property owner Larry Ford said he put up the signs to share his opinion of Obama, who he refers to as "Hussein."
"We've got a man who shouldn't even be president," Ford said when reached by phone Thursday. "He's an insult to the decent, hard-working people that made this country what it is."
By Thursday night, Ford was featured on MSNBC's Countdown with Keith Olbermann as the worst person in the world.
Ford said the feedback he'd gotten in the first 24 hours was positive, but he realized there would be those who disagreed with him.
An active-duty military woman who wrote to the Daily News agreed that the property owner had a constitutional right to express his opinion, but said she was upset that the president's middle name is misspelled.
When that was pointed out to Ford, he wasn't concerned.
"I think everybody knows who I'm talking about, don't you?" he said. "American people are the stupidest people in the world, but something like that I think they can figure out."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
