Listen To This Slut Talk About Not Engaging In Sluttery

Good Morning America! Here is Alaskan teen crackers' fav cum dumpster, Bristol Palin, rapping about the sex and how it's a bad thing to do. Even though she has sexed many many Eskimo meth manufacturers.

Bristol is now the Teen Ambassador for an organization called "Candie's Foundation" which is an online cathouse for white trash. She wants teens to stop having sex....right now!

Not to be outdone, Levi "you know you think about me in the shower" Johnston appeared on CBS this same morning to say abstinence might be cool and all (for losers), but sometimes you just can't help where you put it......even if it's in the portal to one of our universe's famed genetic junkyards:


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Alaskan Snowcunt Officially A Twatterer

Isn't this quaint. Cheerleader for Christ, Sarah Palin, has started a Twitter page.

From The Telegraph:

Perhaps this is a tipping point for Twitter - conservative icon Governor Sarah Palin is now tweeting. Under the moniker @AKGovSarahPalin (not very snappy but there are, by my reckoning, already 32 Sarah Palin twitter accounts) the 2008 Republican vice-presidential candidate has plunged into the social networking maelstrom.

...Interestingly, among the 36 people she's following are GOP 2012 nomination rivals (and fellow governors) Bobby Jindal and Tim Pawlenty and - from the media - Drudge (her first follow), Fox duo Sean Hannity and Bill O'Reilly, NBC's David Gregory and ABC's George Stephanopoulos.


It only took her second twat (the real mother of Trig) to piss and moan about the librul media:

AP gravely misquoted my staff, saying I 'changed my mind' on the stimulus package. For accurate info, go to http://tinyurl.com/c7v84t.
3:13 PM Apr 29th from web

This should be fun.


via Sarah Palin's twat

World Outraged By Obama's Retarded Comment

Someone's been spending too much time with Joe Biden.

More on the story @ Ben Smith

Today's Paultard Video

The tiniest paultard hobbit is back again, imploring fellow gold-fellating 9/11 truther fucksticks to make 20 second video messages for President Obama.

People actually did this:




Dear Mr. Obama: Please do not close Guantánamo Bay and allow brickbat to write the guest list.

via Middle-earth

Government Warns Of Paultard Terrorists

From Wired:

The American military and intelligence communities are increasingly worried that would-be bin Ladens might gather in a virtual world, to plan a real-life attack. But the spies haven't given many details, about how it might be done. Now, a Pentagon researcher has laid out how such a terror plot might unfold. The planning ground is World of Warcraft. The main target of this possibly nuclear strike: the White House.

...In a presentation late last week at the Director of National Intelligence Open Source Conference in Washington, Dr. Dwight Toavs, a professor at the Pentagon-funded National Defense University, gave a bit of a primer on virtual worlds to an audience largely ignorant about what happens in these online spaces. Then he launched into a scenario, to demonstrate how a meatspace plot might be hidden by in-game chatter.

In it, two World of Warcraft players discuss a raid on the "White Keep" inside the "Stonetalon Mountains." The major objective is to set off a "Dragon Fire spell" inside, and make off with "110 Gold and 234 Silver" in treasure. "No one will dance there for a hundred years after this spell is cast," one player, "war_monger," crows.

Except, in this case, the White Keep is at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. "Dragon Fire" is an unconventional weapon. And "110 Gold and 234 Silver" tells the plotters how to align the game's map with one of Washington, D.C.

Xenu: Uncut

Ever wonder the real story behind the strange Space Jesus who gives marching orders to such celebrities as Tom Cruise, Will Smith, John Travolta, and Mitt Romney?

Gawker has it in the words of Scientology's own founder, L. Ron Hubbard, here:

Most of what we know about Scientology's "supreme ruler" we learned from South Park: 75 million years ago, the evil alien brought humans to earth in a spaceship and killed them; the psychic trauma of the event has affected us ever since. The Church of Scientology, embarrassed by the story, has always tried to hide its existence. Until now. The Church has been playing a cat-and-mouse game with YouTubers, getting it removed in many cases; we have the audio of founder L. Ron Hubbard explaining it all, his creepy voice sounding like it's narrating the weirdest Power Point presentation of all time.

Do take a listen.