Saturday, October 4, 2008
Friday, October 3, 2008
Jason Mraz Has Stuff To Say About The Election
If you're still deciding on a candidate this November, the most helpful tool you could use is the WWJMD?™ method. (Bracelet patent pending)
When not singing or dressed as a well-endowed underwear-clad furrie, Jason Mraz has stuff to say:
Last year Bob Dylan compiled a song list for Starbucks' Artist Choice Series. In addition to offering up a keen selection of country, blues, and jazz, he also supplied notes and commentary as to why he held the songs in such regard. BUT, the best part was the forward.
He wrote, "When I was asked to put together this collection of songs, I wasn't sure what to do. So I just grabbed a bunch of things I was into recently. Some people have favorite songs, but I've got songs of the minute -- songs that I'm listening to right now. And if you ask me about one of those songs a year from now, I might not even remember who did it, but at the moment it's everything to me."
What the fuck do this have to do with anything?......you might say:
I bring this up as today's lesson: Nothing is final. One day you're high. The next day you're low. You might have a funky, expressive, or awful haircut today, but soon it will grow into something else, something new and random. Maybe you grew up liking pop music and boy bands, but now you like a specific mash up of Electronic & Classical. You might decide you don't want to smoke cigarettes anymore; that it's just not who you are. Maybe you were a staunch republican but now have curiosities about the well-spoken and well-organized Democratic Nominee. Perhaps you were madly in love last week, but woke up today feeling comfort in solitude, without a desire to be held.
Well-spoken is elitist for uppity negro, I believe.
Let's continue:
Everything is fine. Not finAL.
We tend to instantly identify with "things." And we believe in so much, when in fact, a belief isn't known to be true. It's a hope for the truth. We hold grudges because of what someone said when we were young. We store hurtful words and replay them in our minds until we think it to be true. And some of us believe a TV commercial and think we need a faster computer, a smarter phone, a stronger pill, a more relaxed-fit jean, etc. We think that certain things, thoughts, or actions make us who we are and sometimes we become addicted to those thoughts or behaviors and then become too afraid to let them go.
In summary: Shut the fuck up, Jason Mraz.
Veep Debate Wrapup
Last night was way better than last week's Obama/McCain snoozefest. Joe Biden was calm and collected as he raped Sarah Palin with words, but was kind enough to pay for the rape kit afterwards. Palin stuck to the talking points she was given at McCain's POW camp in Arizona, because she was not allowed out of the bamboo cage until she did.
Right off the bat, the endangered Alaskan Snowcunt admitted she is way unqualified and reinforced the fact that she's been doing this thing for like 5 minutes:
Oh, they talked about those subprime mortgages that black people bought with 5 magic crack beans, but Palin was all "Darn right, it was the banks, doggonnit, heck, golly, GIT-ER-DONE!!!:
Biden and Obama love the gays and go to orgies in San Fran like every other week, schedule permitting. Palin would like to hunt down gays from a helicopter...but she will allow their partners to visit while she skins and guts them:
This is just fun because she pronounces the word nuclear "nucular", like some other unqualified folksy monstertard I seem to remember:
Sarah Palin is asked if she even knows what a Vice President is or does or how to spell those words. After making an awkward joke about how Biden sucks at joke-telling (no shit) she says she will use the office of Veep to take over the world with Jesus as her co-pilot and steal everyone's healthcare and condoms.
And now for the closing statements...
Palin: "Maverick. The Medias will give us AIDS. Maverick. Jesus is AWESOME. Reformer. Maverick. Ronald Reagan's Maverick Freedom AIDS in our bloodstream. Maverick. Snarf."
Biden: "It was nice to meet you lady but, um, you and that elderly gent you spoon applesauce to every afternoon are pretty fucking dangerous and scare the hell out of me and America THE END."
You can view the full debate here.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Sarah Palin Knows A Gay
Here's a cute part of the former Mayor of Methtown's latest interview with Katie Couric:
And on gays, Governor Palin said: “But what you’re talking about, I think, value here, what my position is on homosexuality and you can pray it away, because I think that was the title that was listed on that bulletin. And you know, I don’t know what prayers are worthy of being prayed. I don’t know what prayers are going to be asked and answered. But as for homosexuality, I am not going to judge Americans and the decisions that they make in their adult personal relationships. I have one of my absolute best friends for the last 30 years happens to be gay, and I love her dearly. And she is not my “gay friend,” she is one of my best friends, who happens to have made a choice that isn’t a choice I would have made. But I am not going to judge people.”
It gets better.
Here's her deep thoughts on contraception:
Ms. Couric: If a 15-year-old is raped by her father, do you believe it should be illegal for her to get an abortion, and why?
Ms. Palin: I am pro-life. And I’m unapologetic in my position that I am pro-life. And I understand there are good people on both sides of the abortion debate. In fact, good people in my own family have differing views on abortion, and when it should be allowed. Do I respect people’s opinions on this? Now, I would counsel to choose life. I would also like to see a culture of life in this country. But I would also like to take it one step further. Not just saying I am pro-life and I want fewer and fewer abortions in this country, but I want them, those women who find themselves in circumstances that are absolutely less than ideal, for them to be supported, and adoptions made easier.
Ms. Couric: But ideally, you think it should be illegal for a girl who was raped or the victim of incest to get an abortion?
Ms. Palin: I’m saying that, personally, I would counsel the person to choose life, despite horrific, horrific circumstances that this person would find themselves in. And, um, if you’re asking, though, kind of foundationally here, should anyone end up in jail for having an … abortion, absolutely not. That’s nothing I would ever support.
Ms. Couric: Some people have credited the morning-after pill for decreasing the number of abortions. How do you feel about the morning-after pill?
Ms. Palin: Well, I am all for contraception. And I am all for preventative measures that are legal and safe, and should be taken, but Katie, again, I am one to believe that life starts at the moment of conception. And I would like to see …
Ms. Couric: And so you don’t believe in the morning-after pill?
Ms. Palin: … I would like to see fewer and fewer abortions in this world. And again, I haven’t spoken with anyone who disagrees with my position on that.
Ms. Couric: I’m sorry, I just want to ask you again. Do you not support or do you condone or condemn the morning-after pill?
Ms. Palin: Personally, and this isn’t McCain-Palin policy …
Ms. Couric: No, that’s OK, I’m just asking you.
Ms. Palin: But personally, I would not choose to participate in that kind of contraception.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Looking For A Solution To Your Financial Headaches?
Consider the art of buttfuckery:
My first phone call for this story was to Lee Badgett, the brilliant economist with the Williams Institute, an LGBT public policy think tank at the University of California, Los Angeles. Badgett has been researching gay people and poverty, and is so polite that she suppressed a groan when I told her the reason for my call, but I understood her objections: This story could confirm a stereotype of gays as more privileged than straights. It could make us seem frivolous, and it would continue to ignore the least advantaged in our community.
But then I asked Badgett to send me her preliminary data on gays and poverty. She did so -- the data appear in this story for the first time -- and the numbers show a complicated picture, which does reveal some financial advantage in being a gay man. According to census figures, gay and lesbian couples experience poverty at about the same rate as straight couples of the same race, age, and education level. But when you look at all gay men -- including singles -- they are half as likely to be living in poverty as straight men, according to numbers Badgett compiled from a 2002 survey by the National Center for Health Statistics. That survey showed that 2.1% of gay and bisexual men ages 18–44 live in poverty, compared with 4.2% of straight men in the same age group. (Straight women and lesbian/bisexual women in that age group had no statistically significant difference in poverty rates -- for each cohort, the rate was about 6%.)
However, there may be drawbacks:
Badgett also raised the possibility that in an economy as weak as America’s in late 2008, gay people might undergo discrimination at higher rates as bosses fire employees and pick among a larger applicant pool for new workers. Data from the latest Out & Equal Workplace Advocates survey -- again, presented in this story for the first time -- offer reasons to substantiate her concern. San Francisco–based Out & Equal partners with Harris Interactive and Witeck-Combs Communications every year to survey American employees on their attitudes toward LGBT coworkers. The group’s latest survey contains mostly good news: 79% of heterosexuals agree that gay people shouldn’t be judged by their sexual orientation. Only 22% say they think they would feel uncomfortable working for a boss who is lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender. But here’s the worrisome part: In 2005, when the U.S. economy was vibrant (gross domestic product grew 2.9% that year), 62% of heterosexuals favored written nondiscrimination policies at their companies. In the first two quarters of this year, GDP grew only 2.1% (after shrinking 0.2% in the last quarter of 2007), and now only 46% of heterosexuals favor written antibias policies. Apparently equality seems more affordable when everyone is richer.
Somali Pirates Catch Some Kind Of Iranian Scurvy
No shit.
From boingboing:
Somali pirates who hijacked an Iranian shipping vessel said to be carrying either "minerals" or "small arms and chemical weapons" have, en masse, fallen ill with a mysterious disease. The head of the East African Seafarers' Assistance Programme has been threatened with a lawsuit by the Iranian government for issuing spooky statements to the press to the effect that there was some kind of evil "chemicals" on the ship.
FINALLY: Someone To Blame This Financial Mess On
Add Glitter to Pictures
Dead babies....aborted babies and their killers and/or eaters. Also, the Mexicans.
Waldo Lydecker picks up on a crazy story:
Remember in Philadelphia, how Denzel Washington's character asks people telling him complicated things to "explain it to me like I'm a six year-old"?
Thank goodness Harare Grocery has laid bare the real cause of America's financial meltdown. The headline says it all- "
Why Abortion is a Cause of the Financial Mess (by way of Illegal Immigration)
Let's read, shall we?
Ahem:
Something struck me at breakfast this morning, an awful (and frankly, a little strange) realization that I think has been overlooked in the bailout debate.
One of the root causes of the financial mess we’re in is the holocaust of abortion.
Follow the logic here…
In the thirty five years since Roe v. Wade, 48.5 million babies have been killed (legally) in the United States. That’s 48 million people under the age of 35 that we’re missing as a nation - about 20 million of which would now be in the workforce.
In 1973, according to the US government, the estimated number of illegal immigrants in the United States was at 4 million people. In the intervening thirty-five years, those same years since Roe, that number has quintupled to (you guessed it) around 20 million. To replace the population, especially the workforce population, that had been lost by abortion, businesses turned to an underground market of illegal immigrant labor.
...Those same rule changes allowed no down payment mortgages up to 125% of the value of the house – which encouraged fraud among the illegal immigrant population.
Imagine the fraud possibility – you use the fraudulent documents that allowed you to steal someone else’s identity to also get a mortgage, for 125% of the value of a home, pocket the extra 25% in cash, live in the house for a year, don’t make payments, leave to go work somewhere else and let the bank foreclose. And because you’re on a stolen identity, no one can track you down.
Wow.
McCain To Fake Suspend His Campaign....Again
From TPM:
John McCain made the morning show rounds today. On Fox they were virtually begging him to "suspend" his campaign again in the wake of the bailout failure yesterday on the Hill. You know, since it worked out so well the first time. McCain's answer: He just might suspend again.
Palin Brings That Old Guy This Time
The Alaskan Snow Queen got to use her lifeline and brought WALNUTS! back to CBS to kick Katie Couric's ass.
This is just part of an interview to be aired Wednesday and Thursday. WaPo reported the above clip is the least of their worries:
Palin was halting, repetitive and occasionally stumped on basic questions. And the worst moments -- boasting again, Tina Fey-like, of Alaska's proximity to Russia -- have been endlessly replayed on other networks and the Web.
It may have been a turning point for Couric, who was persistent without being overbearing, in shedding early doubts about her ability to be a commanding presence in the CBS anchor chair. And the worst may be yet to come for Palin; sources say CBS has two more responses on tape that will likely prove embarrassing.
Jonathan Martin says one of these moments has to do with the Supreme Court:
Of concern to McCain's campaign, however, is a remaining and still-undisclosed clip from Palin's interview with Couric last week that has the political world buzzing.
The Palin aide, after first noting how "infuriating" it was for CBS to purportedly leak word about the gaffe, revealed that it came in response to a question about Supreme Court decisions.
After noting Roe vs. Wade, Palin was apparently unable to discuss any major court cases.
There was no verbal fumbling with this particular question as there was with some others, the aide said, but rather silence.
Again......somwhere, Mittens is sobbing like a little girl.
Monday, September 29, 2008
House Fastracks Process Of Americans Becoming Cannibalistic Bums
The $700 billion bailout was defeated in the House, 228 - 205.
The Dow is down 690.
Long story short, we'll all be fighting over refrigerator boxes and gizzards of the elderly and the weak within a few months, whie Nancy Pelosi returns to her former position as the Estee Lauder lady at Saks.
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