Maybe You Should Consider Becoming a Muslin

Hey everybody. Some Chinese science slut says we're all gonna die.

Stock up on duct tape the windows and bottled water. Elohim is coming back to our Earths...and he's pissed:


World Health Organization director-general Dr. Margaret Chan raised the pandemic threat awareness level to 5 out of 6 on Wednesday, meaning the world is at imminent risk of a pandemic from H1N1 swine flu.

"I have decided to raise the level of influenza pandemic alert from phase 4 to phase 5," Chan told a news briefing.


via Reuters

Somali Pirates Catch Some Kind Of Iranian Scurvy

No shit.

From boingboing:

Somali pirates who hijacked an Iranian shipping vessel said to be carrying either "minerals" or "small arms and chemical weapons" have, en masse, fallen ill with a mysterious disease. The head of the East African Seafarers' Assistance Programme has been threatened with a lawsuit by the Iranian government for issuing spooky statements to the press to the effect that there was some kind of evil "chemicals" on the ship.