OMGEEEZTHEREWUZADUBAITTOONITELOLZ!!!!!

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Mad props to PP for filling in and doing a great job.

From what I heard, there was a guy named Joe who is a plumber and fishes dead babies out of Barack Obama's Hamas toilet.

Also, Joe is a plumber.

Live Blog Of The Last Debate

7:03 : PETEPAN will be sitting in for brickbat tonight, so don't get mad at him for what I say. I have been drinking and painting in a closed room for the last 2 hours. Hang on cause here we gooooooooooo..............

7:07 : Time for another beer..

7:34 : Watch the debate here with us

8:02 : Old man talking about rules. I'm sure John Mccain was his baby sitter

8:03 : Here comes the bride...I mean the candidates

8:04 : Mccain - my economy plain is better beause I have 7 houses and I can still pay all my mortgages.

8:07 : Obama - Lets get better education so all americans can pay their mortgages.

8:09 : Mccain has a plumber named joe

8:10 : Obama knows Joe the plumber. Who the hell is Joe? I need a plumber.

8:14 : Mccain does not want to share his money

This moneyz iz minez

8:18 : Mccain is old enough to remember the Great Depression. I think he caused it.

8:20 : Their talk about pork barrels is making me hungry.

8:21 : John Mccain just realized he is not George Bush. His pills must be working.

8:24 : Obama just said torture and Mccain turned white. Oh wait he is white. Lets not forget Mccain was tortured...



8:29 : OMG! The candidates are negative! No fucking shit!!!! Its a fucking presidential race! What the fuck!?!

8:32 : Mccain just laughed when Obama talked about someone saying "kill him". I bet he has a noose in his car.
Time for another beer!!! Yeah!!!

8:36 : I finaly heard the word acorn! Now I can take a shot!

8:39 : They have said acorn so many times I'm drunk now.

8:40 : how the hell did Mccain get from acorn to taxes?

8:41 : Did you know that Biden was from Scranton? Thank god Obama told me.

8:42 : Mccain - "Palin took on the oil companies. She is a breath of fresh air. Oh she has a specail needs kid.".... Is it really her kid? I don't think so. Did she really take on the oil companies, or did she just take money from them? You know you get payed to live in alaska so they can rape the land.

8:49 : I'm drunk...Is anyone reading this? I'm going to take a piss...damn beer.

8:53 : Mccain - Obama does not want to stop drug trade from mexico. Black people want cocaine from mexico so they can make crack.

8:55 : Mccain just said fart...I think.

8:59 : Mccain belives all plumbers all named Joe.

9:00 : So does Obama. Fucked up thing is I have had plumber come to my place and his name was Joe. He did not do a very good job. I had to get another plumber to fix the problem. I don't think his name was Joe. So not all plumbers are named Joe.

9:04 : Really who the hell is Joe? I think I have to come up with a new game. Every time you hear the name Joe take a shot. If you have a plumber named Joe you have to drink the whole bottle.

9:07 : Mccain wants to give the states back their rights. HELL YEAH! I'm tired of paying black people! What?

9:09 : Obama does not care he passes the paper bag test. He would be an inside ni@@er.

9:10 : Is this over yet. I am so glad this is the last debate. Blah Blah Blah. We have all heard the same shit over and over again. If you have not decided who you are voting for by now, then get a fucking special helmet. I'm sure Palin can tell you where to buy one at.

9:15 : Obama wants to kills your babies.....as long as you want to.

9:16 : Mccain has and adopted child. No shit he is to old to have one his self. So Palin has a special needs child that is not hers and Mccain has an adopted child that is not is his, simple, that is why he made her his vp.

9:23 : I dont even think I am listening to the debate at this point.

9:27 : Thank god this is the end. Like I said before I am so tired of this shit. Lets just vote.

9:28 Mccain wants you to trust him. As long it's not in a plane.

9:30 Obama : Who cares what he says. Vote for Obama!!!!!!!!!!! He shits rainbows and pisses gold.

Thank you for reading or not reading. I dont fucking care.

Once again....GO FUCK YOURSELF!!!!!!!!!! OH YEAH GO VOTE TOO

Shameless Self-Promotion

Our Drunken Tennessee Debate Live Blogging Fun Zone 2008™ here.

One Last Thing

From Will Wilkinson:

Gut read. Obama owned it. This election’s over unless he murders and eats the flesh of a child on live television.

Our live blog here.

A Final Word From Sarah Palin

"God has made us this promise: If we will commit our works to Him, we will succeed. Our lives can be enhanced by applying this, and by thinking optimistically. In Alaska we have mosquitoes; we also have the most beautiful mountains in the world. The choice is ours as to which we'll focus on."



via Hotties in the News

UPDATE:: Sarah Palin ate some pizza:

Aboard her campaign plane, after taking questions for the first time from the reporters who follow her every move, Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin told the assembled press and two senior aides standing near her that she didn't want to watch the presidential debate "in my hotel room with just campaign staffers."

The campaign hadn't scheduled a debating watching party for her, but that plan quickly changed. After Palin spoke at a rally here, her campaign entourage of aides and reporters drove to a local pizzeria called Boli's on the Boulevard. Palin went casual, appearing in blue jeans and a purple windbreaker she had been given after her speech at the East Carolina University a few minutes earlier.

As she greeted the surprised crowd of more than 50 at the small pizza place, she posed for several cell phone pictures. When Dana Corey, who was about to start eating, realized Palin was there, he was on the phone with wife. He asked if Palin would say hello and the governor did, joking, "Libby, why is your husband here drinking beer without you?"

The Corey family lives in Wilmington, N.C., and Mrs. Corey explained to the governor that her husband was there because he was working on a construction project in Greenville.

...Asked how the debate went, she was enthusiastic as usual.

"Great. Great. It was a great night for America. He's proposing real plans that will work for economic recovery and energy independence," she said of her running mate.

..."I've been an underdog quite often in my life -- and so has John McCain. And we both have come out victorious," she said. "I anticipate that's what going to what we see at the end of the day on Nov. 4."


Our live blog here.

The Promise Keeper

Huggin' It Out

FAIL

via "That One"

Some More Stuff That People Say

Fallows:

1) From a horse-race perspective, John McCain came in behind and losing ground, in the middle of a financial/economic panic that works against him, and therefore needing a big win. This meant either damaging and flummoxing Obama, or so outshining him in audience rapport, mastery of policy, and empathetic connection through the camera, that the debate could be presented as a turning point. None of that happened. (McCain's best performance was at the end, rejecting a "Yes/No" question on whether Russia is an "evil empire.") At this stage in the race, a tie goes to leader, and this was not a tie.

2) "That one." Difficult to discuss. Unwise for Obama or his campaign ever to mention themselves. But creates an impression that may be impossible to erase.

3) The betting had been, including from me, that this Town Hall format would best suit McCain -- the informality, the opportunity for jokeyness, the track record of handling such questions easily. To my eye, that betting turned out wrong, partly through McCain's doing and partly through Obama's.


Wolcott:

You'd never know from this evening that 5000 Dow points have been lopped since the previous debate.


Goddard:

Tonight's debate wasn't even close. Sen. Barack Obama ran away with it -- particularly when speaking about the economy and health care. Talking about his mother's death from cancer was very powerful. On nearly every issue, Obama was more substantive, showed more compassion and was more presidential.

Ian Welsh:

Here's what I don't understand. Essentially McCain made the same sort of mistakes he made last time. Not friendly enough, not calm, awful body language and so on. Not a statesman. Not a reasuring elder who's seen it all and who can be trusted to deal with it now.

...Or is John "Maverick" McCain too angry to listen? Too frazzled, too tired, too unable to make a change from a game plan that clearly isn't working. Is it the campaign? Or is it him?

Either way, it's actually kind of sad. What I see in John McCain is an old tired man whose anger doesn't just come from being behind but from having worked beyond capacity for too long. He doesn't have Obama's stamina, nor does he have the sense Obama had in taking a week's holiday to recharge. The best thing that the McCain campaign could do now is to come up with some reason to give him the better part of 3 days off. Let Palin campaign for him, she pretty much does anyway. Let him recover.


And for fun, Michelle Malkin:

11:16pm Eastern. I’m forcing myself to watch some of the post-debate commentary.

Disaster: Mitt Romney apparently wasn’t made aware of McCain’s new $300 billion housing entitlement plan. And Fred Thompson could barely muster up enthusiasm for McCain.

Sully's First Reax

"That one."

The moment the contempt spilled over.

And this:

10.33 pm. This was, I think, a mauling: a devastating and possibly electorally fatal debate for McCain. Even on Russia, he sounded a little out of it. I've watched a lot of debates and participated in many. I love debate and was trained as a boy in the British system to be a debater. I debated dozens of times at Oxofrd. All I can say is that, simply on terms of substance, clarity, empathy, style and authority, this has not just been an Obama victory. It has been a wipe-out.It has been about as big a wipe-out as I can remember in a presidential debate. It reminds me of the 1992 Clinton-Perot-Bush debate. I don't really see how the McCain campaign survives this.

Tennessee Townhall Showdown 2008

Glitter Graphics



WHO is Barack Obama?

Did WALNUTS! take his meds?

Will Brokaw kick in my Valium and cause me to fall asleep in about 15 mins?

Let's find out:

8:03 They're sitting at stupid tiny desks. hahahahahaha

8:04 Kojak wants to know the most fastest way out of being a nation of poors. Crack, Kojack. Start selling crack.

8:05 Obama has steps. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ Also, he said crack, so that supports my economic plan.

8:06 WALNUTS! is wandering around the stage and has no idea where he is.

8:07 Stop sending gas money to Barry Hussein's terrorist friends in Hollywood.

8:08 Brokaw's gravitias is uppity.

8:08 Cotton bombs with an insult/joke about Brokaw.

8:09 John McCain's plan to save your savings: Sell everything you own on eBay.

8:10 Barack Obama hearts Warren Buffet.

8:11 Brokaw: "Stay on the fucking topic, morons."

8:11 OMG, a black man. He must be totally in the tank for Barry.

8:12 McCain: "Thanks, boy...but it's not a bailout. I'm not sure what it is, but I'll have to get you back to on that one (wink) Also, you have no idea who Freddie and Fannie are, because of your tiny negro brian and all."

Oh yeh, you can watch this here.

8:14 Obama gives the black man a terrorist fist bump.

8:16 Brokaw: "Mr. Hussein, will we all be hobos?"

8:17 Obama: "Not if you elect someone with a fucking clue."

8:18 McCain: "Mexicans are the best workers in the world. I should know. I own 7."

8:19 Some crazy lady asks how we can trust either one of these guys.

8:19 Barry: "Stopping going out to eat so much and you can save money, you fat sow."

8:21 McCain is a reformer, which is way uncooler than a Transformer. Those bitches have missiles and shit.



8:23 McCain is out in the audience like it's fucking Ellen.

8:23 I think he may be looking for the exit.

8:24 McCain is stumped by health. Hmm.

8:26 Some lady just rolled her eyes at St. Barack. Why does she hate black people?

8:27 Barack Obama keeps talking about the moon, which reminds me of this...



8:30 I've stopped paying attention to that old man. Go read this, which explains the above.

8:31 Barack Obama just mentioned 9/11 before Generalissimo John McCunt. Did that just happen?

8:35 WALNUTS! just mentioned jello. Heh.

8:37 Brokaw is racist.

8:38 Also, he hates old people and their social security cheese.

8:40 McCain: "Ronald Reagan mumble mumble my own friends hate me."

8:43 Some black lady asks McCain about the trees. Who let all these black people in here?

8:46 Obama totally disses Bill Gates and Steve Jobs.

8:47 Brokaw: "Please pay attention to me. Noone does. Noone ever does :("

8:49 Some white lady asks some dull healthcare question. Where is the fun stuff? For real. How about some Keating? How about some William Ayres shit?

8:53 We should be able to go across state lines to buy healthcare....and pills for your wife.

8:57 Barry: "John McCain will smother your children with asthma."

8:59 Barry sips some gin and juice.

9:02 Barry says 9/11 again. Also, McCain is a cheerleader.

9:02 - 9:11 (snicker) Let's blow up Pakistanistans and all brown people.

9:13 Barack Obama says McCain says he says that Barack Obama is green behind the ears. This is not true. He is black behind the ears. Also, John McCain is crazy, if you didn't know.

9:15

McCain: "Veterans something bomb something jello Maverick."

9:18 Are they even taking questions from the cyborgs in the audience? Holograms. Def holograms. Someone call Sarah Connor.

9:21 McCain saw some letters that spelled Putin's name in his Alhpa-Bits.

9:22 Obama: "If Russia wants to buy land, let them. The US has seen how that goes down."

9:25 Another bald guy: "Do you like Israel or LOVE Irael? Check yes or know."

9:26 McCain LOVES Israel enough to blow Lieberman on live teevee. Barack Obama has a swastika tattoo on his left buttock.

9:29 Obama wants one of those cool red Batman phones so he can chat with the Devil at 3am.



9:31 Barry talks about skrimps and food stamps.

9:33 John McCain does not know how to use an elevator.

9:33 Also, he was tortured.

9:34 WHAT THE FUCK IS A TILLER, MR. BURNS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

9:35 Cindy McCain is really doped up. Someone get her a guide dog.

9:36 I shouldn't be seeing Mrs. Islam's zipper. That's not change we can believe in. If you wanna be Jackie O, get a fucking designer.

RACERIOT 2008™ Continues With Townhall Debate Tonight

Barry Hussein and WALNUTS! will face off at 9p Eastern at Belmont Univ. in Tennessee.

Expect some fireworks, given the negative tone the campaigns have been taking the last couple of days.

Stay tuned for live-blogging here....if I don't reach the end of my 18-pack of PBR. Also, watch along at home on MSNBC. It's just funner over there.

Best Part Of The Debate

Veep Debate Wrapup

Last night was way better than last week's Obama/McCain snoozefest. Joe Biden was calm and collected as he raped Sarah Palin with words, but was kind enough to pay for the rape kit afterwards. Palin stuck to the talking points she was given at McCain's POW camp in Arizona, because she was not allowed out of the bamboo cage until she did.

Right off the bat, the endangered Alaskan Snowcunt admitted she is way unqualified and reinforced the fact that she's been doing this thing for like 5 minutes:



Oh, they talked about those subprime mortgages that black people bought with 5 magic crack beans, but Palin was all "Darn right, it was the banks, doggonnit, heck, golly, GIT-ER-DONE!!!:



Biden and Obama love the gays and go to orgies in San Fran like every other week, schedule permitting. Palin would like to hunt down gays from a helicopter...but she will allow their partners to visit while she skins and guts them:



This is just fun because she pronounces the word nuclear "nucular", like some other unqualified folksy monstertard I seem to remember:



Sarah Palin is asked if she even knows what a Vice President is or does or how to spell those words. After making an awkward joke about how Biden sucks at joke-telling (no shit) she says she will use the office of Veep to take over the world with Jesus as her co-pilot and steal everyone's healthcare and condoms.





And now for the closing statements...

Palin: "Maverick. The Medias will give us AIDS. Maverick. Jesus is AWESOME. Reformer. Maverick. Ronald Reagan's Maverick Freedom AIDS in our bloodstream. Maverick. Snarf."

Biden: "It was nice to meet you lady but, um, you and that elderly gent you spoon applesauce to every afternoon are pretty fucking dangerous and scare the hell out of me and America THE END."



You can view the full debate here.

2008 Debate Schedule

1. First Presidential Debate:

* Date: September 26
* Site: University of Mississippi
* Topic: Foreign Policy & National Security
* Moderator: Jim Lehrer
* Staging: Podium debate
* Answer Format: The debate will be broken into nine, 9-minute segments. The moderator will introduce a topic and allow each candidate 2 minutes to comment. After these initial answers, the moderator will facilitate an open discussion of the topic for the remaining 5 minutes, ensuring that both candidates receive an equal amount of time to comment

2. Vice Presidential Debate

* Date: October 2nd
* Site: Washington University (St. Louis)
* Moderator: Gwen Ifill
* Staging/Answer Format: To be resolved after both parties’ Vice Presidential nominees are selected.

3. Second Presidential Debate

* Date: October 7
* Site: Belmont University (Nnashville)
* Moderator: Tom Brokaw
* Staging: Town Hall debate
* Format: The moderator will call on members of the audience (and draw questions from the internet). Each candidate will have 2 minutes to respond to each question. Following those initial answers, the moderator will invite the candidates to respond to the previous answers, for a total of 1 minute, ensuring that both candidates receive an equal amount of time to comment. In the spirit of the Town Hall, all questions will come from the audience (or internet), and not the moderator.

4. Third Presidential Debate

* Date: October 15
* Site: Hofstra University
* Topic: Domestic and Economic policy
* Moderator: Bob Schieffer
* Staging: Candidates will be seated at a table
* Answer Format: Same as First Presidential Debate
* Closing Statements: At the end of this debate (only) each candidate shall have the opportunity for a 90 second closing statement.

via Ben Smith

Highlights from Last Night's Mindnumbing Debate

If you didn't watch it, I'm jealous. I wish I hadn't. That's what the Youtubes are for.

First, yes. Hillary did go there:



Here's the opening remarks. Watch how she won't shut the fuck up. Ever:



Barry discusses Hillary's experience:



Here, Hillary explains why she won't release her tax returns or personal schedule from when she was First Manimal. Then Russert asks Barry why he hates Jews. Barry says that he condems Farrakhan and his actions. Then Hillary jumps in to get the gold star (or Star of David) and says that she would Kung Fu kick Farrakhan right in his Mooslim face.



Closing remarks. Hillary finally kinda sorta apologizes for the Iraq vote. Listen to Barry's answer:

Dem Debate Highlights

Way way boring.

They talked about that place we keep forgetting about:



Here, they talk about Barack being a big ol' word stealer. Hillary uses a really stupid line, something about "change you can xerox." Then she talked about the youtubes. Didn't go over that well.




Near the end, of course we had to talk about Bubba fucking that fat girl. Why is this always brought up?

Anyways, later she says that she doesn't hate black people that much and didn't mind sitting by Barack tonight or something.



Oh yeh, Hillary stole lines from Millboy and Bubba, but we should all know that black people steal stuff more often. When it's a white person, it's borrowing:

Another Moment with Betty Butterfield

It's been a while, but finally a new video:

OMGEEZ!!! THEY'RE GONNA FIGHT TO THE DEATH...Oh, Wait

Last night, there was a much anticipated one-on-one debate between Kenyan terrorist dude Barack Obama and Emo-Hillary. The MSM was hyping this as a contentious showdown with plenty of bloodletting that would splinter the Dem Party.

Yeh, about that:



Oh. Somewhere after the debate, Chris Matthews locked himself in a bathroom and cried like a little baby.

Listen, I don't like Senator Thundercunt. Can't stand her. But this was really nice to see:


Only one last piece of business to take care of as this cordial debate ends. Barack's got to knock down criticism of the blown-out-of-all-reasonable-proportion State of the Union snub! And so, Obama attempts courtliness, stopping to help Clinton from her chair, enjoying a friendly embrace, and then - just so that silver fox Claire McCaskill doesn't get too jealous - a few platonic pats on the back. Detente!




Barry, ever the gentleman. And this is what one HuffPo commenter had to say:

lindalee
Helping Hillary or any able-bodied woman from a chair is sexist, condescending - and in this case, completely calculated. It was a reminder that she is a woman, thus inferior and weak - and she needs a big strong, superior man to help her navigate. BS! Thus was a political move and women should be offended.

I have often said that kissing and hugging the female politicians is the same thing... INAPPROPRIATE! They are supposed to be equals and shaking hands should be the rule

To which I reply....



via HuffPo

Corpse of Reagan to Rise and Run for President