brickbat Returns From Longest Vacation In Recorded History

Jingle jangle and salutations!

We have made it back to this series of tubes after an extended sabbatical to clear our minds of nonsense, such as healthcare, recessions, racist wingnuts, paultards, truthers, and other various types of nonsense.

Now, it's back to the usual. Enjoy (or not) our triumphant return.

Crazy Racist Aunt Up To Her Old Tricks Again

Everyone has a crazy racist aunt, right?

Lately, I've been concerned for her well-being, as I have not received one of her Forward To All masterpieces in quite some time.

And lo, another awkward email is sent:


Mujibar was trying to get a job in India .

The Personnel Manager said, 'Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one. Unless you pass it, you cannot qualify for this job.'

Mujibar said, 'I am ready.'

The manager said, 'Make a sentence using the words Yellow, Pink and Green.'

Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said, 'Mister manager, I am ready'

The manager said, 'Go ahead.'

Mujibar said, 'The telephone goes green, green, and I pink it up, and say, 'Yellow ', this is Mujibar.'

Mujibar now works at a call center.

No doubt you have spoken to him... I know I have.



LOLZ @ MUJIBARZ STOOPID FACE!!!!!!!

via my crazy racist aunt

Conservatives To Republicans: STFU

Build your own Blingee




Holy bejesus. People really don't like this Sotomayor lady.

Take Rush Limbaugh and Tom Tancredo:





Yet, the winner in this crazery has to be G. Gordon Liddy, the douche with the molestache that helped plan the whole Watergate deal.

Here's his thoughts on B.A. Barackus' Mexican girlfriend:

Yesterday on his radio show, conservative host G. Gordon Liddy continued the right wing’s all-out assault on Judge Sonia Sotomayor. First, just like Tom Tancredo, Liddy slammed Sotomayor’s affiliation with the civil rights group La Raza — and referred to the Spanish language as “illegal alien“:

LIDDY: I understand that they found out today that Miss Sotomayor is a member of La Raza, which means in illegal alien, “the race.” And that should not surprise anyone because she’s already on record with a number of racist comments.

Finished with the race-based attack, Liddy moved on to denigrate Sotomayor’s gender:

LIDDY: Let’s hope that the key conferences aren’t when she’s menstruating or something, or just before she’s going to menstruate. That would really be bad. Lord knows what we would get then.

Finally, Liddy disputed the entire idea that there’s anything wrong with the paucity of women and total lack of Hispanics on the Court:

LIDDY: And everybody is cheering because Hispanics and females have been, quote, underrepresented, unquote. And as you pointed out, which I thought was quite insightful, the Supreme Court is not designed to be and should not be a representative body.





In all this madness, the few conservative minds that haven't been warped by Jesus, Xenophobia, and airplane glue have some advice for their peers.

From Ben Smith:


The memo has clearly gone around, and leading conservative voices this morning urged, with unusual harmony, their fellow partisans to be very, very careful in their attacks on Sotomayor.

Peggy Noonan, inimitably, urges the GOP to "play grown-up":

She is of course a brilliant political pick—Hispanic when Republicans have trouble with Hispanics, a woman when they've had trouble with women. Her background (public housing, Newyorican, Catholic school, Princeton, prominence) is as moving as Clarence Thomas's, and that is moving indeed. Politically she's like a beautiful doll containing a canister of poison gas: Break her and you die.

Steele wants an end to the "slammin' and rammin'" of Sotomayor.

Krauthammer: thinks it's a "teachable moment" on justice and race:

What should a principled conservative do? Use the upcoming hearings not to deny her the seat, but to illuminate her views. No magazine gossip from anonymous court clerks. No "temperament" insinuations. Nothing ad hominem. The argument should be elevated, respectful and entirely about judicial philosophy.

We Assume The History Books In The District Need Updating

Ah, prom season.

It's the time of year when doucheteens across the country max out their parents' credit cards to rent snazzy outfits and fancy limousines to attend an overpriced party in their HS gym to bump and grind to the rap music, followed by bumping and grinding in a cheap motel. That is America.

Montgomery County, GA has a very special kind of prom. The kind where white and black folk are segregated. Hoorayz for 2009!!!

From NY Times:


Waiting out the final weeks of the school year, they begin rightfully to revel in the shared thrill of moving on. It is no different in south-central Georgia’s Montgomery County, made up of a few small towns set between fields of wire grass and sweet onion. The music is turned up. Homework languishes. The future looms large. But for the 54 students in the class of 2009 at Montgomery County High School, so, too, does the past. On May 1 — a balmy Friday evening — the white students held their senior prom. And the following night — a balmy Saturday — the black students had theirs.

...Racially segregated proms have been held in Montgomery County — where about two-thirds of the population is white — almost every year since its schools were integrated in 1971. Such proms are, by many accounts, longstanding traditions in towns across the rural South, though in recent years a number of communities have successfully pushed for change.

...Students of both races say that interracial friendships are common at Montgomery County High School. Black and white students also date one another, though often out of sight of judgmental parents. “Most of the students do want to have a prom together,” says Terra Fountain, a white 18-year-old who graduated from Montgomery County High School last year and is now living with her black boyfriend. “But it’s the white parents who say no. … They’re like, if you’re going with the black people, I’m not going to pay for it.”

“It’s awkward,” acknowledges JonPaul Edge, a senior who is white. “I have as many black friends as I do white friends. We do everything else together. We hang out. We play sports together. We go to class together. I don’t think anybody at our school is racist.” Trying to explain the continued existence of segregated proms, Edge falls back on the same reasoning offered by a number of white students and their parents. “It’s how it’s always been,” he says. “It’s just a tradition.”


The whole piece is a great read, but these few lines really stand out:


Earlier this month, on the Friday night of the white prom, Kera Nobles, a senior who is black, and six of her black classmates drove over to the local community center where it was being held. Standing amid a crowd of about 80 parents, siblings and grandparents, they snapped pictures and whooped appreciatively as their white friends — blow-dried, boutonniered and glittering in a way that only high-school seniors can — did their “senior walk,” parading in elegant pairs into the prom. “We got stared at a little, being there,” said one black student, “but it wasn’t too bad.”

After the last couple were announced, after they watched the white people’s father-daughter dance and then, along with the other bystanders, were ushered by chaperones out the door, Kera and her friends piled into a nearby KFC to eat. Whatever elation they felt for their dressed-up classmates was quickly wearing off.


We immediately thought of this:




Story via Jesus' General (MUST read piece here as well)

Today's Godtube/tangle Moment

Class is in session, kids.

Did you know that Thomas Paine, the famous Revolutionary hero and ghostwriter for the Harry Potter book series, is alive? Well he is.

And he's a big 'ol racist.

And he's a Paultard...which is also a type of racist.


via tangle

Everyone Throwing Michael Steele Under The Back Of The Bus

Jesus, this guy can't get a break.

The first black RNC chair is under fire by basically every white Republican in the country.

First, they didn't take kindly to his idea of talking to brown people. Then, they didn't like his use of the intertubes. Oh, and that skirmish he had with the bloated, over-medicated douche nozzle.

Now, he's really screwed he pooch by telling GQ, a magazine for closeted men, that abortion should be a decision left to Americans with lady parts:


How much of your pro-life stance, for you, is informed not just by your Catholic faith but by the fact that you were adopted?
Oh, a lot. Absolutely. I see the power of life in that—I mean, and the power of choice! The thing to keep in mind about it… Uh, you know, I think as a country we get off on these misguided conversations that throw around terms that really misrepresent truth.

Explain that.
The choice issue cuts two ways. You can choose life, or you can choose abortion. You know, my mother chose life. So, you know, I think the power of the argument of choice boils down to stating a case for one or the other.

Are you saying you think women have the right to choose abortion?
Yeah. I mean, again, I think that’s an individual choice.

You do?
Yeah. Absolutely.


Earlier in the article, while still stating he doesn't believe in marriage rights for sodomists, they're cool people and it's not their fault they'll spend an eternity in the Lake of Fire:

Let’s talk about gay marriage. What’s your position?
Well, my position is, hey, look, I have been, um, supportive of a lot of my friends who are gay in some of the core things that they believe are important to them. You know, the ability to be able to share in the information of your partner, to have the ability to—particularly in times of crisis—to manage their affairs and to help them through that as others—you know, as family members or others—would be able to do. I just draw the line at the gay marriage. And that’s not antigay, no. Heck no! It’s just that, you know, from my faith tradition and upbringing, I believe that marriage—that institution, the sanctity of it—is reserved for a man and a woman. That’s just my view. And I’m not gonna jump up and down and beat people upside the head about it, and tell gays that they’re wrong for wanting to aspire to that, and all of that craziness. That’s why I believe that the states should have an opportunity to address that issue.

So you think it’s a state issue?
Absolutely. Just as a general principle, I don’t like mucking around with the Constitution. I’m sorry, I just don’t. I think, you know, in a pluralistic, dynamic society as the one that we have, every five years you can have a constitutional convention about something, you know? I don’t think we should be, you know, dancing around and trying to amend it every time I’ve got a social issue or a political issue or a business issue that I want to get addressed. Having said that, I think that the states are the best laboratory, the best place for those decisions to be made, because they will then reflect the majority of the community in which the issue is raised. And that’s exactly what a republic is all about.

Do you think homosexuality is a choice?
Oh, no. I don’t think I’ve ever really subscribed to that view, that you can turn it on and off like a water tap. Um, you know, I think that there’s a whole lot that goes into the makeup of an individual that, uh, you just can’t simply say, oh, like, “Tomorrow morning I’m gonna stop being gay.” It’s like saying, “Tomorrow morning I’m gonna stop being black.”


As expected, the Klan didn't care for these remarks at all:

Steele drew fire from activists Thursday morning for his remarks.

"I think it is very troubling for a public figure, of either party, particularly one who presents himself as pro-life, to describe the abortion issue as being a matter of 'individual choice,'" That is language straight out of Planned Parenthood's messaging playbook," said Charmaine Yoest, the president and CEO of Americans United for Life Action, who said she hadn't heard from the RNC. "There are millions of pro-life Americans, Republican and Democrat, who are looking for leadership on the life issue and they will find Mr. Steele's comments disturbing and demoralizing."

Another anti-abortion activist and sharp critic of President Barack Obama on the subject, Jill Stanek, was even blunter.

"Michael Steele has just unmistakably proclaimed himself to be pro-choice," she said in an email. "You thought he was 'embattled' last week over his Limbaugh comment? Ha. He has now stepped both feet into it."


This forced Steele to backtrack:

I am pro-life, always have been, always will be.

I tried to present why I am pro life while recognizing that my mother had a "choice" before deciding to put me up for adoption. I thank her every day for supporting life. The strength of the pro life movement lies in choosing life and sharing the wisdom of that choice with those who face difficult circumstances. They did that for my mother and I am here today because they did. In my view Roe vs. Wade was wrongly decided and should be repealed. I realize that there are good people in our party who disagree with me on this issue.

But the Republican Party is and will continue to be the party of life. I support our platform and its call for a Human Life Amendment. It is important that we stand up for the defenseless and that we continue to work to change the hearts and minds of our fellow countrymen so that we can welcome all children and protect them under the law.


Now it's rumored that Katon Dawson, the elderly Grand Wizard who came in second to Steele, is organizing a no confidence vote for next week:

Republican insiders tell Political Wire that a no confidence vote on RNC Chairman Michael Steele is likely to be called after the NY-20 special election on March 31 -- regardless of whether Republicans win the seat or not.

Katon Dawson, who came in second in the January RNC vote, is said to be quietly organizing a vote and is getting the support of several state party chairmen who want to dump Steele.


This will probably work and brickbat will have no further interesting stories about the RNC chair because he will be replaced by a boring white guy.

Sigh.

Local Moron Mentioned On Famous Moron's Show

Jesus jump roping Christ.

In short:

A man who flies a Confederate flag on property he owns on Beal Parkway added two large signs Wednesday to express his feelings about President Barack Obama.

"January 20, 2009, A Day of Darkness, Hussen (sic)" is written on both signs, which are each about the size of a dinner table.

...Property owner Larry Ford said he put up the signs to share his opinion of Obama, who he refers to as "Hussein."

"We've got a man who shouldn't even be president," Ford said when reached by phone Thursday. "He's an insult to the decent, hard-working people that made this country what it is."

By Thursday night, Ford was featured on MSNBC's Countdown with Keith Olbermann as the worst person in the world.

Ford said the feedback he'd gotten in the first 24 hours was positive, but he realized there would be those who disagreed with him.

An active-duty military woman who wrote to the Daily News agreed that the property owner had a constitutional right to express his opinion, but said she was upset that the president's middle name is misspelled.

When that was pointed out to Ford, he wasn't concerned.

"I think everybody knows who I'm talking about, don't you?" he said. "American people are the stupidest people in the world, but something like that I think they can figure out."

Missouri Lawmakers Sign Bill To Fight Mooslim Tyranny

Some Republicans got together and decided that, in these trying economic times, Issue #1 should be outing our Half-Breed Muslin President for the Illuminati Caliph Devil he is. What would be the best way to do that? Amend the state constitution:

Fifteen Republican members of the Missouri General Assembly have signed on to a state constitutional amendment that appears aimed at advancing the claims of the fringe movement that doubts President Barack Obama's eligibility to serve as president.

The language is contained in a proposed "voter’s bill of rights," which would serve "as a defense against corruption, fraud, and tyranny."

The proposed amendment states:

"For candidates who are required by the Constitution of the United States to be natural born citizens, the secretary of state shall request an official copy of the candidate’s birth certificate. Other certifications, such as a certificate of live birth, shall not be accepted. Should any candidate fail to provide an official birth certificate within thirty days of the request by the secretary of state, his or her name shall not be placed on the ballot."

The Birthers, as they're known, have focused on the State of Hawaii's refusal to release the original of Obama's birth certificate, as opposed to official copies; Hawaii state law bars the release of the original.

Michael Steele Determined To Turn Next GOP Convention In To Vibe Awards

Only weeks after the election of the first black RNC chair, Steele sets out to scare off the remaining elderly racists within his party by reaching out to young brown hooligans.

His strategy? Giving the party of Strom Thurmond, Trent Lott, Tom Tancredo, and Ron Paul a "hip hop" makeover that will be "off the hook".

Sounds Fun:

Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele says his party is going to launch an "off the hook" public relations campaign that will update the GOP’s image by translating it to "urban-suburban hip-hop settings."

The new GOP leader told the Washington Times that the party’s defeat in states such as North Carolina and Virginia made it clear they needed a new approach.

“We need messengers to really capture that region — young, Hispanic, black, a cross section…” he said in an interview published Thursday. “We want to convey that the modern-day GOP looks like the conservative party that stands on principles. But we want to apply them to urban-surburban hip-hop settings.”

He added, jokingly, that “we need to uptick our image with everyone, including one-armed midgets.”

Steele described the new multi-platform PR offensive as “avant-garde, technically. It will come to [the] table with things that will surprise everyone — off the hook.” Asked whether that meant cutting-edge tactics, Steele demurred. “I don't do 'cutting-edge,’” he said. “That's what Democrats are doing. We're going beyond cutting-edge.”

GOP Elects...wait...what? A Black Guy?

The RNC chair race was a really interesting thing. After being slaughtered in the last two election cycles, no one important or interesting or having a modicum of decency would get anywhere near that tar baby.

Enter a couple of black guys and a gaggle of Klansmen.

After 6 ballots, Michael Steele defeated some elderly Grand Wizard who was traumatized as a child by being forced to attend school with a bunch of "nagras".

He then instituted a new reign of black terror within the party, mugging several aged Republicans in the parking lot while shouting death threats:

"We're going to say to friend and foe alike: 'We want you to be a part of us, we want you to with be with us.' And for those who wish to obstruct, get ready to get knocked over,"

Today's Godtube Moment

Words can't describe.

Here's the description from Godtube:

Sarah Palin tries to make a difference by throwing starfish that are stranded on the shore back into the sea while Obama and Biden stand by and watch.

Today's Godtube Moment

Holy Lord, it's that elderly wigger again. This time, she's here to shake us down.

We're pretty sure she's the biggest racist in the country.

The Recession

The GOP's "Base"

Another Chapter Of RACERIOT 2008™ Theatre

AlJazeera followed Sarah Palin to Ohio, where they interviewed a bunch of honkeys that mustered up the intellect to put shoes on and gimp their way down to hear Bible Spice spread the Good Word.

Today's Installment Of RACERIOT 2008™ Theatre

From Gawker:

Hours before Sarah Palin showed up to get BOOED at the Flyers opener in Philadelphia, she hosted a rally in Johnstown, PA. And the citizen at left showed up with a stuffed monkey with an Obama sticker on its head. "This is little Hussein," he boasted smugly to cameras. Surely the other McCain/Palin supporters admonished him in the no uncertain terms, yes? No. They giggled and clapped.

McCain On Defense...From Own Party

It's like trying to put toothpaste back in the tube. What's done is done.

TPM sums up the latest:

After taking criticism for standing by for days while his supporters grew increasingly unhinged and hysterical, John McCain did the right thing today, telling his supporters that there's no need to be "scared" of a president Obama and calling on them to be "respectful" towards him.

...That's all fine. But if McCain wants to lower the temperature, how about stopping with the new ad implying that Obama is currently in league with a current terrorist? And if we see Wright come up next week, will this stuff still be operative?



Rep. John Lewis' thoughts:

"What I am seeing reminds me too much of another destructive period in American history," Lewis said in a statement issued today for Politico's Arena forum. "Sen. McCain and Gov. Palin are sowing the seeds of hatred and division, and there is no need for this hostility in our political discourse."

..."George Wallace never threw a bomb," Lewis noted. "He never fired a gun, but he created the climate and the conditions that encouraged vicious attacks against innocent Americans who were simply trying to exercise their constitutional rights. Because of this atmosphere of hate, four little girls were killed on Sunday morning when a church was bombed in Birmingham, Alabama."

...“As public figures with the power to influence and persuade, Sen. McCain and Gov. Palin are playing with fire, and if they are not careful, that fire will consume us all," Lewis said today. "They are playing a very dangerous game that disregards the value of the political process and cheapens our entire democracy. We can do better. The American people deserve better.”

Barack Obama's Terrorist Acorn Family Tree

In our continuing coverage of "HOLY SHIT. PEOPLE ARE LIKE THIS", here's the latest from Ben Smith:

As the reality that Obama could become president sinks in, the ire directed at him is amping up, as in this striking video taken by a liberal Ohio blogger outside a McCain-Palin rally in Ohio.

...And while the vitriol may help, a bit, in rallying the base, it's also probably not something independent voters are going to find terribly attractive.

WTF Did Chris Matthews Just Say?

He just said this to Howard Fineman:

"We know each other, I don't know, like two guys at a bank in Florida."

Update: He's being a total d-bag to one of McCain's "my friends."

Holy Shit. People Are Really Like This.

Goshdarnit, Bible Spice just brings out the best in people. Take this rally in Orlando for example:

"Okay, so Florida, you know that you're going to have to hang onto your hats," Sarah Palin told a rally of a few thousand here this morning, "because from now until Election Day it may get kind of rough."

You betcha. And the person dishing out the roughest stuff at the moment is Sarah Palin.

"I was reading my copy of the New York Times the other day," she said.

"Booooo!" replied the crowd.

"I knew you guys would react that way, okay," she continued. "So I was reading the New York Times and I was really interested to read about Barack's friends from Chicago."

It was time to revive the allegation, made over the weekend, that Obama "pals around" with terrorists, in this case Bill Ayers, late of the Weather Underground. Many independent observers say Palin's allegations are a stretch; Obama served on a Chicago charitable board with Ayers, now an education professor, and has condemned his past activities.

"Now it turns out, one of his earliest supporters is a man named Bill Ayers," Palin said.

"Boooo!" said the crowd.

"And, according to the New York Times, he was a domestic terrorist and part of a group that, quote, 'launched a campaign of bombings that would target the Pentagon and our U.S. Capitol,'" she continued.

"Boooo!" the crowd repeated.

"Kill him!" proposed one man in the audience.

Turns out, that wasn't the only Klanish moment:

Palin's routine attacks on the media have begun to spill into ugliness. In Clearwater, arriving reporters were greeted with shouts and taunts by the crowd of about 3,000. Palin then went on to blame Katie Couric's questions for her "less-than-successful interview with kinda mainstream media." At that, Palin supporters turned on reporters in the press area, waving thunder sticks and shouting abuse. Others hurled obscenities at a camera crew. One Palin supporter shouted a racial epithet at an African American sound man for a network and told him, "Sit down, boy."