Ann Coulter's Chris Matthews/BO Sex Fantasy

Money about 7:30 in.

The Whore May Actually Win

Meet Stormy Daniels. She has sex for a living. She may also run for Senate.

Daniels is mulling the idea of taking David Vitter's seat, who, yes, is the guy who wears diapers and fucks stuffed animals:

A website has launched a petition in an effort to draft adult entertainer Stormy Daniels to run against Louisiana Republican Sen. David Vitter -- and the would-be challenger granted her first interview at an Arizona hotel, where she was performing at a strip club.

"While traveling through Arizona last week, I learned that Daniels would be performing at a Phoenix strip club," muckraking reporter Max Blumenthal wrote Monday. "I tracked the adult-video starlet down at her hotel and filmed the first interview with her since the Draft Stormy initiative began. During our exclusive interview, Daniels homed in on what she called Vitter's hypocrisy, declaring her intention to make his contradictory behavior the centerpiece of her campaign."

...Vitter's phone number was found in the records of the D.C. madam who apparently committed suicide last year and may have led to the resignation of CIA director Porter Goss. Now he could get a sampling of what he may have already sampled: an eyebrow-raising woman who's paid to perform. Only this time, it could be at the ballot box.

..."I personally have no issues with his sexual activities or his sexual preferences or whatever it is that he wants to do. My issues with him -- who am I to judge, right? My issue with him is that he is a hypocrite and call me what you will but you can't call me a hypocrite," Daniels told Blumenthal.

BREAKING NEWS: Group Lamer Than Cutters Exists!!!

Teenage girls that embed foreign objects in their skin:

Those unfortunate souls who find cutting insufficiently harmful have taken mutilation to the next level with something doctors call "self-embedding disorder." According to the Chicago Tribune, embedding is when people deliberately insert objects into their flesh, either by forcing them through wounds or by puncturing the flesh with those objects.

"Personnel at Nationwide Children's Hospital in Columbus, Ohio, report extracting 52 foreign objects that 10 teenage girls deliberately embedded in their arms, hands, feet, ankles and necks over the last three years, including needles, staples, wood, stone, glass, pencil lead and a crayon. One patient had inserted 11 objects, including an unfolded metal paper clip more than 6 inches long."

via Jezebel

GROSSGROSSGROSSGROSSGROSS

Some Brazillian lady talks about how good WALNUTS! is in bed:

A Brazillian newspaper tracks down a notable McCain ex-girlfriend:

"He was tasty, loving and romantic," says Maria Gracinda Teixeira de Jesus, 77, a former beauty queen and dancer, of the young John McCain, whom she met in Rio de Janeiro in 1957.

Also, "good at everything."

Palin's Proven Credentials As GOP Sexual Deviant

Sure, Sarah brags about her fiscal acumen when she was Ice Princess/Ice Queen of lower Canada, but Salon has a great piece on how she spent $50k renovating her office in Wasilla to look like a fucking whorehouse:

Sarah Palin has been touting herself as fiscal watchdog throughout her political career. But Palin's tenure as mayor of Wasilla, Alaska, was characterized by waste, cronyism and incompetence, according to government officials in the Matanuska Valley, where she began her fairy-tale political rise.

"Executive abilities? She doesn't have any," said former Wasilla City Council member Nick Carney, who selected and groomed Palin for her first political race in 1992 and served with her after her election to the City Council.

Four years later, the ambitious Palin won the Wasilla mayor's office -- after scorching the "tax and spend mentality" of her incumbent opponent. But Carney, Palin's estranged former mentor, and others in city hall were astounded when they found out about a lavish expenditure of Palin's own after her 1996 election. According to Carney, the newly elected mayor spent more than $50,000 in city funds to redecorate her office, without the council's authorization.

"I thought it was an outrageous expense, especially for someone who had run as a budget cutter," said Carney. "It was also illegal, because Sarah had not received the council's approval."

According to Carney, Palin's office makeover included flocked, red wallpaper. "It looked like a bordello."

Lindsay Lohan Has Things To Say/Slur About Palin Baby Bonanza

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Read this shit:

When SamRo's away, LiLo will blog. Last night, Lindsay Lohan took to her blog for help locating Dixie cups of marble ice cream before Samantha Ronson returned home and then finished up the entry by dedicating a song to her girl with the lyric "I've been saved by a woman." Yeah, pretty typical stuff.

So that's why we were caught off guard when Linds offered up a particularly fair and balanced political entry this morning. The topic at hand: Republican V.P. candidate Sarah Palin and all that baby drama surrounding her 17-year-old daughter.

Lindsay writes: "I think the real problem comes from the fact that we are taking the focus off of getting to know Sarah Palin and her political views, and what she can do to make our country a less destructive place. Its distracting from the real issues, the real everyday problems that this country experiences."

Sex For Tix

Some slut is offering sexy time for tickets to tonight's speech at Invesco:

There's lots of ticket cadging going on in Denver today, but this posting in the "casual encounters" section of Craigslist is hard to beat:

I am a card carrying Dem but that's only part of my interest in this week. This week has brought more excitement, people, and activity than I will probably ever see here again. I just need the right guy to help me plug into it all.

I'm downtown today and would love to accompany you tonight's speech and the parties afterward. I'm real. I like sex but I'm not a ho, so please show some respect. I'm 43, 5'6", slender, brown hair, hazel eyes, hispanic, ex-model.

I could easily meet you for coffee, lunch or drinks to see if we click ... if you reply with a pic, I will respond one way or the other. Let's enjoy the day, see our next President speak and celebrate afterwards.

The post in the "w4m" section of Denver's Craigslist page is illustrated with a snapshot of the poster's cleavage.

Day 2 Of Giant Lesbo/Furry/Masochist Orgy 2008

It's Lady Bitter Day because 88 Years ago sluts got the right to vote. This means pandering to Hilltards and letting Thundercunt speak about 18 million crackwhores or something.

Highlight of the day? It's Shirley Franklin time:

Hour #1 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM (LOCAL)
Call to Order
The Honorable Shirley Franklin
Mayor of Atlanta, Georgia

Invocation
Reverend Cynthia Hale
Disciples of Christ - Decatur, Georgia

Presentation of Colors
The American GI Forum
Mile High Chapter, Colorado
Congressionally chartered Mexican-American veterans & civil rights organization

Pledge of Allegiance
Koby Langley
From Fort Mead, Maryland, he received the Bronze Star for leadership in the US Army
Credited with design & implementation of 1st Foreign Torts Claims Policy Act - Iraq

National Anthem
Rocky Mountain Children's Choir
A multicultural, multiracial choir committed to forming community around music

Remarks/Video
The Honorable Eleanor Holmes Norton
Non-voting Member of the US House of Representatives, District of Columbia

Remarks
Ted Sorenson
Special Counsel, advisor and speechwriter to President John F. Kennedy
Researched and drafted Kennedy's "Profiles in Courage"

The Honorable Mike Honda
Member of the US House of Representatives, California

Dr. David Gipp
Member of the Standing Rock Sioux Tribe
President - United Tribes Technical College

The Honorable Linda Sanchez
Member of the US House of Representatives, California

The Honorable Chet Culver
Governor of Iowa

The Honorable David Paterson
Governor of New York

The Honorable Patrick Leahy
US Senator, Vermont

Hour # 2 4:08 PM – 5:00 PM (LOCAL)
Remarks
The Honorable Chris Van Hollen
Member of the US House of Representatives, Maryland

Remarks
Cecile Richards
President of the Planned Parenthood Federation of America
Daughter of the former Governor of Texas, The Honorable Ann Richards

Congressional Black Caucus
The Honorable Carolyn Kilpatrick
Member of the US House of Representatives, Michigan
The Honorable Charles Rangel
Member of the US House of Representatives, New York
The Honorable John Conyers
Member of the US House of Representatives, Michigan
The Honorable Bennie Thompson
Member of the US House of Representatives, Mississippi

Moment of Silence

Video – “In Memoriam”

Remarks
The Honorable Dennis Kucinich
Member of the US House of Representatives, Ohio

The Honorable John Chiang
State Comptroller, California

The Honorable Jim Doyle
Governor of Wisconsin

The Honorable Ted Strickland
Governor of Ohio

DGA - Remarks
The Honorable Joe Manchin
Governor of West Virginia

Hour # 3 5:00 PM – 6:00 PM (LOCAL)
US Senate Women
The Honorable Barbara Mikulski
US Senator, Maryland
The Honorable Barbara Boxer
US Senator, California
The Honorable Mary Landrieu
US Senator, Louisiana
The Honorable Blanche Lambert Lincoln
US Senator, Arizona
The Honorable Debbie Stabenow
US Senator, Michigan
The Honorable Maria Cantwell
US Senator, Washington State
The Honorable Claire McCaskill
US Senator, Missouri
The Honorable Amy Klobuchar
US Senator, Minnesota

Remarks
The Honorable Ed Rendell
Governor of Pennsylvania

The Honorable Tammy Baldwin
Member of the US House of Representatives, Wisconsin

The Honorable Xavier Becerra
Member of the US House of Representatives, California

John Sweeney
President of the AFL-CIO

Robin Golden
Autoworker from Michigan scheduled to lose his job

Video - First Time Delegates: Renewing America's Promise

Remarks
The Honorable Rahm Emanuel
Member of the US House of Representatives, Illinois

Live Performance
Alejandro Escovedo
Vocals & guitar

Hour # 4 6:01 PM – 7:00 PM (LOCAL)
Remarks
The Honorable Steny Hoyer
Member of the US House of Representatives, Maryland
Democratic Majority Leader

Katherine Marcano
Cedar Rapids, Iowa flood victim

Anna Burger
Officer with SEIU & 1st Chair of America's newest labor federation, "Change to Win"

Pauline Beck
Homecare worker & member of SEIU from Oakland, California

The Honorable Janet Napolitano
Governor of Arizona

America’s Town Hall - Economy
Moderator: The Honorable Jennifer Granholm – Governor of Michigan
Panelists: Aimee Christensen, Jim Rogers, Jim Bauer, Jerome Ringo

Remarks
Jim Whitaker
Republican Mayor of Fairbanks, Alaska

Pamela Cash-Roper
Unemployed nurse and lifelong Republican from North Carolina

The Honorable Nydia Velazquez
Member of the US House of Representatives, New York

Hour # 5 7:00 PM - 8:00 PM (LOCAL)
Remarks
The Honorable Kathleen Sebelius
Governor of Kansas

The Honorable Federico Peña
Former Secretary of Energy and former Mayor of Denver, Colorado

Nancy Floyd
Founder of Nth Power – an energy technology investment firm in Portland, Oregon

The Honorable Robert Casey, Jr.
US Senator, Pennsylvania

Lily Ledbetter
Her actions against Goodyear Tire led to the passage of the Fair Pay Restoration Act

Keynote Speech
The Honorable Mark Warner
Governor of Virginia

Remarks
Ret. Rear Admiral John Hutson
President, Franklin Pierce Law Center in Concord, New Hampshire
Lifelong Republican

The Honorable Deval Patrick
Governor of Massachusetts

Hour # 6 8:02 PM – 9:04 PM (LOCAL)
Remarks
Gloria Craven
Laid-off North Carolina textile worker with huge medical bills

The Honorable Brian Schweitzer
Governor of Montana

Hillary Clinton Segment - Video/Remarks
The Honorable Hillary Rodham Clinton
US Senator, New York

Benediction
Revs. Jin Ho Kang, Yoougsook Kang
Methodists - Aurora, Colorado

Recess
The Honorable Shirley Franklin
Mayor of Atlanta, Georgia

Father Of The Year

Gawker points out two great things:

This video is still on Edwards' Youtube channel.

Skip to the 1:00 mark for some sweet irony.

Also, check out this quote from Rielle a couple years ago:

"I've only met her once," Hunter told Newsweek reporter Jonathan Darman in late 2006 during a lunch in which she mistakenly cast him as a friend. "She does not give off good energy. She didn't make eye contact with me."

Um, that might have had something to do with you porking her husband.

Slut.

Not Sure How To Feel About This One

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Paris responds to Generalissimo John McCunt's stupid ad.

Hey Cindy, Show Us Your Tits!!!

Well, WALNUTS! made it to the Buffalo Chip hootenanny. Once there, he got so wrapped up in the fun of it all that this happened:

Indeed, McCain felt so comfortable at the event that he even volunteered his wife for the rally’s traditional beauty pageant, an infamously debauched event that’s been known to feature topless women.

“I encouraged Cindy to compete,” McCain said to cheers. “I told her with a little luck she could be the only woman ever to serve as first lady and Miss Buffalo Chip.”

After the event, WALNUTS! punched her in the throat and called her a cunt.

Westboro Flamer Update

Ohhhhh yes. Whomever started this little garage fire thing will now feel the wrath of Fred Phelps and his army of homosexual homophobes.




Let's check out their blog:

DON’T WORRY ABOUT THE FIRE
AT WESTBORO BAPTIST CHURCH
THE FIRE YOU NEED TO BE WORRIED ABOUT IS THE ONE COMING OUT OF GOD’S NOSTRILS –
THAT STREAM HAS A BEAD ON DOOMED AMERICA
AND THE FIRE YOU NEED TO BE WORRIED ABOUT IS THE ONE THAT IS KINDLED BY GOD’S BREATH FOR ETERNITY – THAT STREAM HAS A BEAD ON YOU!

THANK GOD FOR THE CRIMINAL ARSONIST!
OUR WORDS COME AT YOU LIKE A SWORD ON FIRE!
YOU CAN NOT BREAK OFF THESE BONDS!
CHECK IT OUT NOW DOPEY DOOMED AMERICA:
YOU ALSO CAN NOT BURN OFF THESE BONDS!

YOU’RE PLAYING WITH FIRE – AND IT’S A FIRE YOUR FIREFIGHTERS CAN NOT PUT OUT!

THIS MAKES US SO HAPPY!

...You foolish rebels. When will you learn?

Speaking of learning, you learned that stupidity from Baltimore.

The Baltimore case inspired criminal arsonists. Ironically the arsonist tried to burn the very property those Baltimore haters want to try to take.

Speaking of learning, when will you get this through your thick disobedient heads: What you try to do to the people of God and his church, God will do to you. Now you can expect God to send fire from heaven and burn your “churches” (whore houses and dog kennels).

Apparently you are slow learners. Over six thousands lightening strikes – THAT’S FIRE DUMMIES – from God’s hand in California. You’re still playing with fire!

(Today a team of faithful watchers are on the ground in California, picketing the funeral of the dead fag in Sanoma County who was the first to get "married" in that county. Now the butt buddy is dead – at age 37, 37 days after the fag marriage license went forth. Some media mutt said his death was “shocking.” Are you kidding me? That was so predictable it’s painful! You’re playing with fire you arrogant asses! Our God doeth all things well. Besides which, he also has quite a sense of humor and irony. )

Psst! God still hates fags. America is still doomed. God still hates the world. Your acts of arson have changed exactly nothing.

In summary, Baby Jesus hates fags blah blah blah and Fred Phelps will live for 1000 years the end.

John McCain To Find Younger, Sluttier Wife

Why does John McCain hate women?

At an event called the Buffalo Chip held in South Dakota, John McCain will share the stage with a topless women and Kid Rock:

On Sunday, the McCain campaign announced that the Senator will participate in the Sturgis Rally 2008 at Buffalo Chip in South Dakota, an annual tribute to American veterans. The event is up the Arizona Republican's wheelhouse, attracting thousands of active duty and former servicemen, many who have a natural affinity towards the Senator.

But it is hard not to notice the evocative, non-political sideshows that will literally surround McCain's speech. As the presumptive nominee takes the stage, the "Ringin' Wet & Wild" women's wrestling event will be taking place on the main amphitheater. Two hours before then, the "Miss Buffalo Chip Beauty Pageant - Bikinis on the Beach" will be staged at a different venue. That affair is described by ESPN's Jim Caple as "essentially a topless beauty pageant. And occasionally bottomless, too."

"During a drenching rain Wednesday night, the contest broke up into smaller groups and one woman wound up dancing naked on a bar top. Her boyfriend/husband saw her and angrily dragged her away as she struggled to put her pants back on and muttered something about how, "It's only this one week a year.""

What A World

No charges for the married whoremonger NY Governor who paid to have sex with alot of whores.

Possibly 25 years for the lady who answered phones to send whores to whoremongers, such as said governor.

via Reuters

Cocks For Glocks

Tony Zirkle is possibly the most awesome candidate ever. I hope he keeps his track record of losing so he can run for everything forever.

Here's his latest brilliant plan:

I'm considering discussing divorce aids and my plans for a "Derrenger's for Dildos" policy to put guns in American women's hands instead of divorce aids. Presently, when a criminal is arrested for a weapons crime, the prosecutors seek orders to destroy those weapons. What a waste! Put our criminal prisoners to work modifying those guns to be smart-guns that can only be fired when the female owner is holding it so that children don't hurt themselves and so that criminals can't use them (unless they use the woman's hand). When a women turns in her stash of divorce aids, then give her a free gun to defend America when the jihadists follow us home.

I may discuss the historical fact that before there were Nazi doctors, there were divorce aid doctors who used these divorce aids to "treat" "hysterical" women. Is there an etymological connection between hysterical and hysterectomy? http://www.dailycal.org/article/9535/sex_on_tuesday_history_69

I may also call attention to the fact that one of the biggest commercial frauds is that divorce aids market themselves as being for "novelty purposes only" so that they can avoid all consumer safety inspections; yet ,they then go to court and claim they have a 1st Amendment so called right to privacy to abuse their bodies. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19333870/page/2/ Who knows what toxic chemicals these women are inserting into the most intimate areas of their bodies and how many men chase children because they can not find comfort from an adult women.

Ezekiel noted women made male images and committed whoredom with them just before their 70 years of slavery, and Bertrand of Worms implored women to set aside their divorce aids about a generation before the crusades began. (I'm still looking for the cite on Bertrand (sp?) of Worms).

Jeremiah 3:9: And it came to pass through the lightness of her whoredom, that she defiled the land, and committed adultery with stones and with stocks.

Ezekiel 16:17 (Whole Chapter)
Thou hast also taken thy fair jewels of my gold and of my silver, which I had given thee, and madest to thyself images of men, and didst commit whoredom with them.

Ezekiel 16:26 (Whole Chapter)
Thou hast also committed fornication with the Egyptians thy neighbours, great of flesh; and hast increased thy whoredoms, to provoke me to anger.

(That last one did not sound like a ringing endorsement for Jungle Fever to me. Maybe that should go into the self-determination segregation section).

By giving our soccor moms guns, they will be better able to take out the suicide bombers once they start following us home. Isn't that what the republicans are saying will happen if the deomcrats get elected and even dare to withdraw our troops from Iraq prematurely?

So, maybe we need a whole army of Sen. Hillary Clinton styled Annie Oakleys? Didn't Sen. Obama recently say that one would think she was Annie Oakley or something.

If the Derrengers for Dildos idea doesn't get me an invite to John Stewart's Comedy Central or the Colbert bump, I'm not sure what will.

Whoredom is now my favorite word.

Tony Zirkle for Congress via Jesus' General