Ralph Nader: Bill Clinton Of The General Election

Here's some fun quotes from everyone's favorite perennial pretend president:

"There's only one thing different about Barack Obama when it comes to being a Democratic presidential candidate. He's half African-American," Nader said. "Whether that will make any difference, I don't know. I haven't heard him have a strong crackdown on economic exploitation in the ghettos. Payday loans, predatory lending, asbestos, lead. What's keeping him from doing that? Is it because he wants to talk white? He doesn't want to appear like Jesse Jackson? We'll see all that play out in the next few months and if he gets elected afterwards."

..."He wants to show that he is not a threatening . . . another politically threatening African-American politician," Nader said. "He wants to appeal to white guilt. You appeal to white guilt not by coming on as black is beautiful, black is powerful. Basically he's coming on as someone who is not going to threaten the white power structure, whether it's corporate or whether it's simply oligarchic. And they love it. Whites just eat it up."

It's This Guy

Nader announced his running mate will be Matt Gonzalez, San Fransisco Supervisor and Board President, which is just a fancy way of saying "some guy that ran for mayor and lost."

Gonzalez was born to a Mexican mother and Mexican-American father. This fact will ensure that Tom Tancredo and Lou Dobbs will not rest until they track him down and deport him to Guantanamo.

via USA Today and Wiki

Nader to Announce Fellow Loser Shortly

A couple of minutes from now, Ralph Nader will announce who will be his running mate for the 2008 election.

Please be Ross Perot. Please be Ross Perot. Please be Ross Perot.

via votenader.org

Ralph Nader and Ego Announce Presidential Run

As announced earlier, Ralph Nader is once again going to lose a presidential campaign. He sat down on Meet the Press to bore us about shit we've heard the other candidates prattle on about for over a year.

He touched on a wide array of subjects: Juan Mccain is a warmonger. Barack Obama is lazy. David Letterman hates the elderly. Democrats are whiney bitches who lost 2000 because Katherine Harris is a satanic twat. (okay, maybe he's right about that one)

Enjoy:

Ralph Nader Hates Black People, Women, and the Elderly

And to prove it, he's going to run for President again:

The consumer advocate will appear on NBC's "Meet the Press" on Sunday to announce whether he will launch another White House bid. Nader kicked off his 2004 presidential run on the show

...Kevin Zeese, who was Nader's spokesman during the 2004 presidential race, but is no longer working for him, said Friday that Nader has been actively talking to "lots of people on all sorts of levels" about the possibility of making another run.

Zeese said he could only guess what Nader might do, but added: "Obviously, I don't think ("Meet the Press" host) Tim Russert would have him on for no reason."

Instead of traditional campaiging, he will go door to door until he's told every 2 year old in America there is so Santa Clause.

via HuffPost