Conservatives To Republicans: STFU

Build your own Blingee




Holy bejesus. People really don't like this Sotomayor lady.

Take Rush Limbaugh and Tom Tancredo:





Yet, the winner in this crazery has to be G. Gordon Liddy, the douche with the molestache that helped plan the whole Watergate deal.

Here's his thoughts on B.A. Barackus' Mexican girlfriend:

Yesterday on his radio show, conservative host G. Gordon Liddy continued the right wing’s all-out assault on Judge Sonia Sotomayor. First, just like Tom Tancredo, Liddy slammed Sotomayor’s affiliation with the civil rights group La Raza — and referred to the Spanish language as “illegal alien“:

LIDDY: I understand that they found out today that Miss Sotomayor is a member of La Raza, which means in illegal alien, “the race.” And that should not surprise anyone because she’s already on record with a number of racist comments.

Finished with the race-based attack, Liddy moved on to denigrate Sotomayor’s gender:

LIDDY: Let’s hope that the key conferences aren’t when she’s menstruating or something, or just before she’s going to menstruate. That would really be bad. Lord knows what we would get then.

Finally, Liddy disputed the entire idea that there’s anything wrong with the paucity of women and total lack of Hispanics on the Court:

LIDDY: And everybody is cheering because Hispanics and females have been, quote, underrepresented, unquote. And as you pointed out, which I thought was quite insightful, the Supreme Court is not designed to be and should not be a representative body.





In all this madness, the few conservative minds that haven't been warped by Jesus, Xenophobia, and airplane glue have some advice for their peers.

From Ben Smith:


The memo has clearly gone around, and leading conservative voices this morning urged, with unusual harmony, their fellow partisans to be very, very careful in their attacks on Sotomayor.

Peggy Noonan, inimitably, urges the GOP to "play grown-up":

She is of course a brilliant political pick—Hispanic when Republicans have trouble with Hispanics, a woman when they've had trouble with women. Her background (public housing, Newyorican, Catholic school, Princeton, prominence) is as moving as Clarence Thomas's, and that is moving indeed. Politically she's like a beautiful doll containing a canister of poison gas: Break her and you die.

Steele wants an end to the "slammin' and rammin'" of Sotomayor.

Krauthammer: thinks it's a "teachable moment" on justice and race:

What should a principled conservative do? Use the upcoming hearings not to deny her the seat, but to illuminate her views. No magazine gossip from anonymous court clerks. No "temperament" insinuations. Nothing ad hominem. The argument should be elevated, respectful and entirely about judicial philosophy.

The One Minute Man

President Unicorn found it in his heart and schedule to allow Judy Shepard 60 seconds of his time.

From The Advocate:

Shepard told The Advocate that she received the Obamas’ invitation on Monday, the same day White House press secretary Robert Gibbs told Advocate Washington correspondent Kerry Eleveld during a press briefing that he “didn’t have the answer” to her question about repealing the antigay Defense of Marriage Act.

Upon arriving at the White House on Wednesday, Shepard first met with the president in the Oval Office. The meeting was short -- “It was supposed to be 10 minutes, but his meeting beforehand ran long and I only had a minute or so with him,” Shepard said. But it was long enough for Obama to assure Shepard that he was still a supporter of the hate-crimes bill named in honor of her son, a gay man who was murdered in Laramie, Wyo., in 1998 at age 21.

She was then ushered to a luncheon hosted by Michelle Obama. “It was me and about 80 other people,” she said, adding that she wasn't able to speak one-on-one with the first lady.

Although she understands that many activists, like Mixner, are becoming increasingly frustrated with the White House, Shepard encourages people to be patient when it comes to LGBT legislation.

“We are victims of our own hope,” she says. “These bills are going to get passed, it’s just going to take time and work.”

Angry Kid Touchers Angered At President Who Kills/Eats Babies Before They Reach Ripe Age Of 8

As was expected:

It's telling that the pro-life guys doing the protesting are both men who clearly didn't graduate recently. I'm all for public protests, but there's an astroturf quality to some of these religious right protests, and conservative protests overall. You'd think, if the students were truly upset that Obama was coming to their school, that some - uh - students themselves might protest?


Def lacks the subtlety of dead baby dolls in Spongebob strollers.


via AMERICAblog

Here Is Your President Obama, Ctd.

Picking up from our previous post.

Here's a piece from Sully:

I lived through eight years of the Clintons and then eight years of Bush. Through it all, gay people were treated at the federal level like embarrassments or impediments. With Clinton, we were the means to raise money. With Bush, we were the means to leverage votes by exploiting bigotry. Obama seemed in the campaign to promise something else. I listened to him in the early days and found him sincere about ending discrimination by the government; and I came to respect, while vehemently disagreeing with, his position on federal civil unions. He seemed genuinely distressed that gay servicemembers should be treated with contempt and persecution by their commander-in-chief, that gay couples should have to fight for basic human treatment - like entry to hospital rooms, or being able to stay in the same apartment as their late spouse, or forced into cruel separation by immigration laws that treat gay couples as threats, rather than assets, or if you had the temerity to survive HIV, being treated at the US border the way Jesse Helms always wanted people with HIV to be treated - like perverts and pariahs and threats.

...it's tedious to whine and jump up and down and complain when a wand isn't waved and everything is made right by the first candidate who really seemed to get it, who was even able to address black church congregations about homophobia. And obviously patience is necessary; and legislative work takes time; and there are real challenges on so many fronts, especially the economy and the legacy of war crimes and the permanently restive Iraqi and Afghan regions we are constantly in the process of liberating from themselves. No one expects a president to be grappling with all this early on, or, God help us, actually leading on civil rights. That's our job, not his.

But I have a sickeningly familiar feeling in my stomach, and the feeling deepens with every interaction with the Obama team on these issues. They want them to go away. They want us to go away.


Here we are, in the summer of 2009, with gay servicemembers still being fired for the fact of their orientation. Here we are, with marriage rights spreading through the country and world and a president who cannot bring himself even to acknowledge these breakthroughs in civil rights, and having no plan in any distant future to do anything about it at a federal level. Here I am, facing a looming deadline to be forced to leave my American husband for good, and relocate abroad because the HIV travel and immigration ban remains in force and I have slowly run out of options (unlike most non-Americans with HIV who have no options at all).

And what is Obama doing about any of these things? What is he even intending at some point to do about these things? So far as I can read the administration, the answer is: nada. We're firing Arab linguists? So sorry. We won't recognize in any way a tiny minority of legally married couples in several states because they're, ugh, gay? We had no idea. There's a ban on HIV-positive tourists and immigrants? Really? Thanks for letting us know. Would you like to join Joe Solmonese and John Berry for cocktails? The inside of the White House is fabulous these days.


Then Dan Savage replies:

Fact is, Obama has "acknowledge [the] breakthroughs in civil rights" that we've seen in Iowa and other states. And here it is:



See? Obama has acknowledged the breakthroughs in civil rights for gay Americans! He told a joke about it at the White House Correspondents' Dinner this weekend. (You were there, Andrew, didn't you catch it?) Barack Obama condescended to use marriage equality as a punch line; he made, essentially, a Chuck & Larry joke about two straight dudes—Obama and Axelrod—running off to Iowa to "make it official" with the queers and their "partners." And that's hilarious, you see, because Obama and Axelrod aren't actually homos! So they don't need to go to Iowa to make it official! They can get married—to women—in all fifty states! HA!

The more I think about the joke Obama told at the WHCD the more ticked off I get. We're witnessing rapid and historic progress in the fight for gay equality and Barack Obama, who campaigned on our issues and described himself as a "fierce advocate" of gay and lesbian equality, hasn't acknowledged the breakthroughs in Iowa, Vermont, New Hampshire, and Maine in a setting or a with comments that are in any way equal to the significance of this historic moment. The best he can do—all he's willing to do—is toss off an Adam-Sandler-level joke.

So here's what I would've said if I'd been prepared for the question: Our lives, our families, and our rights are not a joke, Mr. President. The discrimination faced by gay people—whether coupled and single—is distressingly real and persists even for same-sex couples in Iowa and other states where gay marriage is legal. Stop fucking around and start delivering on your campaign promises to us, to our families, and to our children.

Here Is Your President Obama

This is the guy you voted for.

Soak in it:


Amid mounting calls from think tanks, former military leaders, and current servicemembers to end the military's failed "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy by executive order, White House Press Secretary said today that President Obama will not intervene.

Said Gibbs: "To get fundamental reform in this instance requires a legislative vehicle. The president made a promise to change this policy; he will work with the Joints Chiefs of Staff, the administration and with Congress to ensure that we have a policy that works for our national interests...There have been discussions about the best way to move forward, and the only sustainable way to do that is through -- sustainable and durable way -- is through legislation, which the president has promised and has continued to work for."

Yesterday, the Palm Center released the results of a study along with a blueprint that would allow the President to end the failed military gay ban via executive order. Lt. Dan Choi, a skilled Arabic linguist and the first gay soldier fired under Obama, published an open letter to the President and Congress pleading that the military not discharge him.


Change™.


via Towleroad

First Muppet Arrives At White House

The moment has arrived. The Obamas finally got their dog, which is a hand-me-down from an elderly talking Lion from the Land of Massachusia:

The little guy is a 6-month-old Portuguese water dog given to the Obama girls as a gift by that Portuguese water dog-lovin' senator himself, Edward M. Kennedy of Massachusetts. The girls named it Bo -- and let it be noted that you learned that here first. Malia and Sasha chose the name, because their cousins have a cat named Bo and because first lady Michelle Obama's father was nicknamed Diddley, a source said. (Get it? Bo . . . Diddley?)


But what of the pledge to adopt a hobo AIDS dog?:


The choice of a Portie raised one complication. The Obamas have long said they wanted a rescue dog. But the carefully bred PWDs almost never end up in shelters. Bo had been living with another family, but it wasn't a good fit, so the Kennedys acquired him for the Obamas.

As for the rescue pledge, the Obamas came up with a solution intended to lend a serious symbolic note: They're going to make a donation to the D.C. Humane Society.

Checkin' In With Chuck

Why does the Muslin Devil Obama hate Jesus? Chuck Norris explores the issue in a holiday themed piece over at WND:


According to a new national survey by the Pew Research Center for the People & the Press 10 percent of Americans still believe Obama is a Muslim. Seven percent of Democrats believe it. And nearly 20 percent of evangelicals do.

That is how people across the country responded to the question, "Do you happen to know what Barack Obama's religion is? Is he Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Buddhist, Hindu, atheist, agnostic or something else?"

What I find fascinating is that the same study showed only 55 percent of Democrats knew or believed Obama was a Christian, even after nearly two years on the political trail for president spouting his views and beliefs on everything under the sun.

Moreover, 35 percent of all of those polled have no clue as to what religion the president adheres. That's one-third of the nation he leads. One in three people don't have any idea of his religious convictions. Should the percentage be that high? Religion might be a private choice, but should it be a secret one too, even for a leader?

...Any questions? No Holy Week hesitations here. His name is Jesus, and I believe He was born into this world to die for the sins of mankind, that whosoever believes in him shall have eternal life – just as I chose to do decades ago at a Billy Graham crusade in Los Angeles.

Is Obama afraid of the "Jesus" word? I'm not, and maybe that's where my heart and mind should dwell during this period in which one billion people around the world commemorate his Via Dolorosa. Rather than ask what we believe about Obama's religion, maybe we should be answering what we believe about ours.

Whatever your religious persuasion, don't be ashamed of it. And don't hesitate to let others know where you stand, respectfully speaking. This is America. And that's one of the things that still makes us a great nation. In God we trust.

Morning Dump

Surprise!

Guess what?! The White House has a fever, and the only prescription... is more KalPenn.

The problems of the world won't be solved by love alone. You need the opposite of love too... and by "opposite" we mean Scientology.

Tiny chinaman hobbit weeps.

What exactly does Joe Biden do for a living?

This thing is still going on?

G-20 Furry Kegger Update

Our monies are fixed, so you can stop worrying now.

A new romance has bloomed this Spring.

Michelle Obama date raped some old hemophiliac blue hair.

President Unicorn broke up a fight.

The French whoremonger and the secret Putin buttpuppet want Timothy Geithner's job.

World Leaders Meet To Plot Horrible New Ways To Ruin Our Ekonumeez

Geez, is it that time already?

President Unicorn has landed in London for the G-20 Summit, which is a fancy title for a multi-cultural rainbow party.

Some citizens of London do not care for this elitist orgy. Nope, not at all:




In more important news, the Telegraph is still being pissy about Obama's horrible gift-giving abilities. The Queen received an iPod from the First Couple, which is a crime against humanity because the old bag already has one:

Barack Obama met the Queen at Buckingham Palace today and gave her a gift of an iPod loaded with video footage and photographs of her 2007 United States visit to Richmond, Jamestown and Williamsburg in Virginia. In return, the Queen gave the President a silver framed signed photograph of herself and the Duke of Edinburgh - apparently a standard present for visiting dignitaries.

It is believed the Queen already has an iPod, a 6GB silver Mini version she is said to have bought in 2005 at the suggestion of Prince Andrew.


Also on the agenda: Michelle Obama will fight Carla Bruni-Sarkozy to the death. Michelle will emerge the victor and celebrate her by dining in the company of various Satanist cult leaders the end.

Today's Paultard Video

Again with the tiniest hobbit.

We'd stop mocking if he's stop videoing. Or whatever that word would be.

From the description:

twitter me twitter.com/robertwanek

my president is fascist he wants me to serve thats the bottom line respect he can't earn.


via Middle-earth

Inbred Shit-troll Waddles Her Way To Washington

Westboro Baptist Church sent their members a-wassailing to the White House to express their anger against the Muslin Devil, Barack Obama. The group was led by the daughter of reknowned gay fisting porn star, Fred Phelps.

From Towleroad:


Shirley Phelps-Roper and a contingent from the Westboro Baptist Church paid a visit to the White House yesterday to pray for God to shortly destroy the "antichrist" Barack Obama. They were met by counter-protestors who far outnumbered them, according to Campus Progress.


One question: Where can we buy one of those awesome purple hoodies?

Here's some more video funnery from the event:

Morning Dump

Paultards may have found the perfect country for exile.

What's in a name?

Oh please oh please oh please oh please...

Field Trip!!!

West Virginia you say?

Meghan McCain admits that embracing handsome young gentlemen callers is the GOP's Only Hope™

President B.A. Barackus To Bitch Slap Detroit

Oh my.

President Sunshine is pissed the fuck off.

And, more than likely,he is a secret liberal Buddhist Caliph.

From Politico:


President Barack Obama announced an extraordinary bid to remake the ailing U.S. auto industry Monday, saying he would withhold long-term federal aid to two carmakers unless they make sweeping changes to ensure their survival.

In blunt terms, Obama said his vision for reshaping GM and Chrysler would be painful to the companies and their workers, but insisted the strong medicine was the only course to saving them – while also leaving open the possibility they could fail.

And he spoke directly to auto workers and communities who rely on the plants, saying, “I will not pretend the tough times are over. I cannot promise you there isn’t more pain to come. But what I can promise you is this – I will fight for you. You are the reason I am here today.”

“These efforts, as essential as they are, will not make everything better overnight. There are jobs that cannot be saved. There are plants that will not reopen. . . .”

...In the case of GM, Obama sought the resignation of CEO Rick Wagoner, and Wagoner complied by stepping aside. Obama gave GM 60 days to restructure and sounded optimistic the company could.

In the case of Chrysler, Obama was much more pessimistic – giving them only 30 days to cut a merger deal with Italian automaker Fiat. If they merged, he offered $6 billion in new loans. If they don’t, Obama said they would get no more federal aid – and likely be forced into bankruptcy.

“Year after year, decade after decade, we have seen problems papered-over and tough choices kicked down the road, even as foreign competitors outpaced us. Well, we have reached the end of that road,” Obama said. “And we, as a nation, cannot afford to shirk responsibility any longer. Now is the time to confront our problems head-on and do what’s necessary to solve them,” Obama said.

Obama Harshes America's Buzz

Good crikey Jiminy Christmas fuck. This guy again.

President Unicorn has not been told that the election is over and he won. Because of this, he still travels around the country while Tim Geithner & Co. are left in charge to plot new horrible ways to force us in to unemployment office lines.

Today, Obama held a virtual Town Hall meeting, taking questions from various robots of the future.

The question that has gotten the most attention came from an android named "Jared" who was just laid off by the fat cats at Skynet. Jared v.1.3 asked if it would be cool to grow a marijuana garden, just like the POTUS already has.

The response:

"No, I don’t think that is a good strategy to grow our economy," he said.




Guess pot won't be legal until we can come up with real patriotic slogans for it like Freedom Fried or Liberty Leaves.

Dick Warz

Make custom Glitter Graphics

From The Hill:

Congressional Republicans are telling Dick Cheney to go back to his undisclosed location and leave them alone to rebuild the Republican Party without his input.

Displeased with the former vice-president's recent media appearances, Republican lawmakers say he's hurting GOP efforts to reinvent itself after back-to-back electoral drubbings.

The veep, who showed a penchant for secrecy during eight years in the White House,has popped up in media interviews to defend the Bush-Cheney record while suggesting that the country is not as safe under President Obama.

Rep. John Duncan Jr. (R-Tenn.) said, “He became so unpopular while he was in the White House that it would probably be better for us politically if he wouldn’t be so public...But he has the right to speak out since he’s a private citizen.”

Another House Republican lawmaker who requested anonymity said he wasn’t surprised that Cheney has strongly criticized Obama early in his term, but argued that it’s not helping the GOP cause.

The legislator said Cheney, whose approval ratings were lower than President Bush’s during the last Congress, didn’t think through the political implications of going after Obama.

Cheney did “House Republicans no favors,” the lawmaker said, adding, “I could never understand him anyway.”

Morning Dump

The Ayatollah did not care for Barack's sexy rap music video. Guess he's more of a traditional "flowers and chocolates" kind of girl.

Someone should tell the president it's not a good idea to hire a Treasury Secretary that spends money like a soccer mom at an outlet store all hopped up on goofballs.

VP Biden finally finds an appropriate place to say inappropriate things.

There is no such thing as shutting up Barney Frank.

Having a hard time jump-starting your career? Have you tried the Afghan job market?

Or try applying at the Washington Post. Seems like they'll hire anyone.

RedState Pretends To Know Gay People

This is just too rich:

President Obama is reportedly set to nominate California Representative Ellen Tauscher for the post of Undersecretary of State for Arms Control and International Security.

If you consult Ms. Tauscher’s biography, her work on arms control and non-proliferation makes its first appearance in the 12th paragraph (in a bio with 14 paragraphs overall). Her work in this area is apparently not as important as her work on Wall Street, her leadership on the Transportation Committee (including getting funding for a tunnel in her district), or her work on public school funding - all of which get prominent mention before non-proliferation issues.

...There’s another interesting thing about Ms. Tauscher: she is the sponsor of legislation to undo the military’s ‘Don’t Ask Don’t Tell’ policy. She reintroduced the legislation on March 3 — about two weeks before her nomination was announced. It has 134 cosponsors as of today - nearly one-third of the House, just a few weeks after introduction. When she introduced the bill, she planned to hold hearings to educate the public, and suggested that Secretary Powell could lead the effort to sell repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell. It seems as if Ms. Tauscher had done a good job of laying the groundwork for an effort to repeal the measure in the House.

So why did Barack Obama choose to elevate a leader for repealing the ban on gays in the military, to a position where she would lose all influence over the matter?

...If I had supported Barack Obama because he promised to allow gays to serve openly in the military, I sure would be disappointed today. It’s a shame they couldn’t pick someone other than Ms. Tauscher for such an important post.


Thanks for caring.

President Unicorn Sends Sexy Terror Video Message To Fellow Muslins

From Ben Smith:

Here's some unusual direct diplomacy: A video message to the people of Iran on the Iranian new year.

So in this season of new beginnings I would like to speak clearly to Iran's leaders. We have serious differences that have grown over time. My administration is now committed to diplomacy that addresses the full range of issues before us, and to pursuing constructive ties among the United States, Iran and the international community. This process will not be advanced by threats. We seek instead engagement that is honest and grounded in mutual respect.

You, too, have a choice. The United States wants the Islamic Republic of Iran to take its rightful place in the community of nations. You have that right -- but it comes with real responsibilities, and that place cannot be reached through terror or arms, but rather through peaceful actions that demonstrate the true greatness of the Iranian people and civilization. And the measure of that greatness is not the capacity to destroy, it is your demonstrated ability to build and create.

World Outraged By Obama's Retarded Comment

Someone's been spending too much time with Joe Biden.

More on the story @ Ben Smith